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Uncut
> has a nice beard
> has 88 in his name
> is good at dancing
> generously shares his PPs with everyone or plans to do so soon
> has stayed in California, as all Californians should

Seabee
> writes beautiful poetry
> is getting his money's worth on that windows 95 PC
> works exclusively in ms paint because adobe products are for suckas
> fought bravely against the enemies of Israel
> doesn't waste any precious space of his 10GB harddrive on a reaction pic folder

Zack
> knows everyone loves remasters, just like record companies
> good at photoshop
> great at image processing programs that do all the work for you
> doesn't want you to join the discord, tells you to leave
> celebrates valentine's day all year long

Sev
> has sex drive through the roof but is redpilled on womyn
> has cool dreams
> lives in one of the only two based Euro countries
> doesn't care about Ashley, only the board and the discord
> milks his government's welfare system, because they deserve it

Duke
> knows everything about Vandread
> thoroughly psychoanalyzed Vandread
> exposed Vandread
> works out right before bed so he sleeps better
> searching for Vandread so he can expose her/him/it yet again

LB
> has a vivid imagination
> tells lots of funny stories
> knows all the tricks to seduce dumb women with daddy issues
> knows that age is just a number
> still in the closet (based)

Luke
> got to pretend-boyfriend status with Ashley (farther than anyone else)
> there are 2 of him, which is more than 1
> has a 5/10 beard
> skin is blemish free in pictures just like people in magazines
> has a 60% chance of not killing himself

Ashley
> makes new content at least once every 7 years
> kicked my ass at M...Garfield Kart
> knows Queen sucks
> is still a KV, true to her name (bet you've never heard that one before)
> only makes me cry twice a day

did I miss anyone?