> dropped out of high school because depressed with family problems, no friends, failure > worked third shift at a walmart in bumfuck nowhere > got addicted to weed because i was so bored and it was something to do all day and night > nothing to live for > orbiting threads start popping up like crazy on r9k > find the girls qt, post for lulz out of boredom > end up getting kind of attached to a couple of the girls even though i never spoke to them > join sheep village, don't talk much but catch up on the girls posts every day like the morning paper > start daydreaming about the girls all the time to entertain myself and feel less lonely > they consume my thoughts, can't go an hour without thinking of them, i start to genuinely believe i might have a chance someday even though ive never once spoken to any of them and barely know who they are > daydreams become more real to me than the girls themselves > their posts and posts about them start fucking me up because they contradict with my daydream version of them, i get pissed off and start making hate threads, spamming nasty shit on halfchan, making up stories about the girls. some of these stories still circulate as truth even though i completely fabricated them (i stopped doing this a couple years ago) > realize i'm doing something wrong, im hurting others and myself with this, i stop posting and lurking, then i get sucked back in soon after I've been in therapy for a while and it's helping a lot. Becoming self aware of these patterns and why im like this is key I guess. I dont wanna be this way.