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< he didn't know this is from his Park Tool™ PPL-1 PolyLube 1000™ Lubricant (Tube)

Meanwhile, me, using my newly acquired Park Tool™ AK-5 Advanced Mechanic Tool Kit have discovered, thanks to Park Tool™ CC-4 Chain Checker, that my chain is FUCKED and I will have to replace it with my Park Tool™ MLP-1.2 Master Link Pliers.