Has anyone here quit porn completely?
Let's be blunt, I'm a man and I have needs. I have a need to fuck. I'm not going to stop fapping. I did it for several months before and all that happened was I went really lusty around women who thought I was creepy, had constant awkward boners and jizzed at night during sex dreams so I had to wear underwear to bed. I didn't feel any more energetic or any of that bs, I just felt insanely driven to impregnate a woman.
Having said that, I do look at porn but that's the part I want to stop. Porn is generally quite sickening or just sad. After watching porn I get a slightly depressed feeling from looking at the ugly shit show that is humanity. Porn in general seems mostly driven by exploitation but more importantly there is no love there and certainly no joy. Even my own memories of having sex with women I'm left with a feeling of how horrible they were, like trash, certainly with no real care for me or perhaps even themselves. I go without porn for maybe a few weeks but then my own imagination isn't cutting it and I've forgotten how sad it really is. I fool myself to think I will see something truly fulfilling and satisfying just to scratch the itch and relieve myself but then I see it and by that time I'm already there and mostly finish to a feeling of disgust. I'm plagued by the thought of a better world where these girls could be happy mothers kissing me with deep appreciation.
I've felt this way for years but no matter how many times I walk away from it, I've always gone back. I'm willing to accept this if it's an unavoidable part of my human condition but I was wondering if anyone has achieved permanently quitting?