>>/90604/
Close-ish guess but not quite, I'm Christian Palestinian, so the Italian family dynamic comparison isn't far off (Mediterranean nonetheless, with crusader genes).
As for the kike band leader, I concur you're  totally correct, but I think in my desperation for still trying to cling onto some semblance of being able to perform in a band I took one step too low.

I know totally ignoring people around me and doing "my thing" is probably better in terms of measurable results, yet still, as someone that can easily empathize with and does care about others I don't want to waste that - but I also don't want to end up sabotaging myself like I've done for so long.
Any pointers would be greatly welcome, as I'm sure there is something which I'm not seeing but can be done to get out of this rut.

P.S.:
I know that I'm not a son of Europa by the eyes of many here, even if I have some Italian genes (from my maternal grandmother's side) I still also have a lot of Palestinian and generic Arab genes.
And while I'm starting to better explore my native culture after that the jew has nearly severed my people from it, the very fact that they occupy and steal my land while decimating my people places a heavy burden on my shoulders - shoulders that I would like to broaden such that I can carry this weight.