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The number of employees increases under Parkinson’s law, and the increase will not change if the number of cases has decreased, increased or disappeared. Parkinson’s law is important because it is based on the analysis of factors that determine the above increase.

The value of this newly-discovered law rests largely on the statistics that we will soon cite. The ordinary reader, however, is more curious to know what causes the tendency which our law expresses. Omitting the technical details (of which there are many), we can distinguish two main driving forces. For our present needs, let us give them the form of two almost axiomatic propositions:

(1) an official multiplies subordinates but not rivals;

(2) officials work for each other.

. . .

DON'T CAUSE, or Parkinson's disease

Everywhere you look, we see institutions (administrative, commercial, and scientific) where the top brass wears out with boredom, the top brass just gets animated by sitting on each other’s backs, and the rank-and-file employees yearn or have fun with gossip. There are few attempts, no fruits. Looking at this sad picture, we think that the staff fought to the end and gave up inevitably. However, recent studies have shown that this is not the case. Most of the fervent institutions have long and persistently pursued coma. Of course, this is the result of the disease, but the disease usually does not develop by itself. Here, noticing her first signs, she was helped in every possible way, her reasons deepened, and her symptoms were welcomed. This disease consists in consciously cherished inferiority and is called unwed. It is much more common than people think, and it is easier to recognize than to cure it.

As logic dictates, we describe its course from beginning to end. Then we will talk about its symptoms and teach you how to make a diagnosis. In conclusion, we will talk a little about the treatment, about which, however, little is known and hardly anything will be learned in the near future, because English medicine is not interested in this. Our doctors are happy if they describe the symptoms and find the cause. It's the French who start with treatment, and then, if it comes, argue about the diagnosis. We will adhere to the English method, which is much more scientific, although it is not easier for the patient. As they say, the movement is all, the goal is nothing.

The first sign of danger is that among employees there is a person who combines complete unfitness for his job with envy of others' successes. Neither one nor the other in a small dose is dangerous, many have these properties. But when they reach a certain concentration (express it by formula N3Z5), they react chemically. A new substance is formed, which we will call non-recognition. The presence of it is determined by external actions, when this person, not coping with his work, always sticks into someone else’s and tries to enter the leadership. Seeing this mixture of unfitness and envy, the scientist shakes his head and quietly says, “Primary, or idiopathic, is unwhipped.” Its symptoms, as we shall show, leave no doubt.

The second stage of the disease occurs when the carrier of the infection at least to some extent breaks through to power. Often it all starts right from this stage, as the carrier immediately takes the leadership position. It is easy to identify him by the tenacity with which he survives those who are more capable than he is, and prevents those who may be more capable in the future from advancing. Without hesitating to say, “This Font is too clever,” he says, “He is clever, but is he reasonable?” I prefer the cipher. Without hesitating to say again, “This Font clogs me,” he says, “I think Shifra has more common sense.” Common sense is a curious concept, in this case the opposite of the mind, and it means devotion to routine. The cipher goes up, the font goes somewhere else, and the states are gradually filled with people who are stupider than the boss, the director or the chairman. If he's second class, they'll be third and make sure their subordinates are fourth. Soon everyone will compete in stupidity and pretend to be even more stupid than they are.