>>/12592/
> The camera was proffered to Chuck. "Get her, Snow Drift specifically, to help you, using this camera. Use whatever lies you want or need to. My colleague has put a tracking spell on it so we'll know to pick her up for … well, anyway."
Alright, here we have some more intrigue and clarification (sort of) on intent. Okay, seeing here: >>/12571/
> Fears over the mission or avoidance over her unicorn aunt? I also am guessing the aunt might be the unicorn from the royal guard who is crying about her niece being sent on a suicide mission... maybe? That is the only thing I am confused over and that could be easily fixed with context.
I had somehow (his brief appearance or my exhaustion induced) mistaken the gender of who I now know to be Snow Ski, (or is it Snow Sky?) Snow Drift's uncle. His concern wasn't fear of something bad happening to her but of her sheer existence and presence there. We also get some key information:
> Snow Drift suddenly appeared and this timing is significant to Snow Ski, presumably with her disappearance.
> Snow Drift had met Ground Chuck Snow Drift only just over three weeks ago, and she seemingly enrolled in the school within that time frame.
> Most significantly, Snow Drift having wings is new.
So, the mystery thickens. 

I don't have much to say on the flow or critiques this time. Perhaps it would be nice to know more of what Ground Chuck thought of everything  going on with Snow Drift. I initially found myself surprised that he was just going along with the royal guard wanting to question or detail his friend, but she is a new friend he hardly knows and seemingly a drifter. Considering the situation and added stress, that is a pretty human-er, pony-reaction. More context before I can fully judge this of course, but that is my take right now. All I will say on the griffon invasion cloud fort at the moment is that I like the concept and think it is something very in show canon even you're more of the type to be running with concepts and the world beyond the show. 

One Grammar Note:
> The unicorn stallion pulled himself together, still weeping but making eye contact with his coworker. Berryfield shook the camera in her aura, and Snow needed several breaths to steady himself before he closed his eyes
I assume the proper spelling is Berry Field based on the conventions your other names have.Though as a mononym I don't think is bad if that is the proper spelling. 

> missed plot armor that nopony got but was promised a couple paragraphs above.
Was that a plot hole or intentional?