>>/5842/
Non-reproductive heterosexual sex is really common in humans. Women have a sex drive even if they aren't ovulating. You can be against that morally, but "deviant" seems wrong empirically.
> gays use their "gayness" as a personality and sole identifier
Pretty much nobody does that. Some people turn it into an important part of their identity, but that's rare outside of social justice activism culture, and most homosexuals are outside social justice activism culture.
Signaling it can be useful socially, much in the way that married people often signal that they're married, so it can end up as a small part of their identity.