thumbnail of We're here to grant your wish xxxHolic Yuko.png
thumbnail of We're here to grant your wish xxxHolic Yuko.png
We're here to grant... png
(111.98 KB, 636x699)
 >>/3968/
I just remembered that episode from xxxHolic when they went to a girl who had an unhealthy forum addiction and it started to ruin her life and she asked help in that. That was the least magical but the best example how you can overcome addictions.

> As far as the goddess goes
Now about that... huh this will be a hard one to word.
Your "mundane worship" is so weak it's almost pointless.
> because i personally felt too unworthy and too consumed by stuff and knew she wouldn't be alright with someone like that
Something like that yes.

> i came back to worship and serve her around last year and never stopped praying/worshipping her every night
That is good but you need to get into the "proper mindset".
So instead of praying to her try to "talk to her" extremely "sincerely". The first words that come to your mind while thinking about what you want to really say to her or talk to her about. You must not use your misconceptions as some foundation to stand on but instead of learn to be in the "air" or presence which is "front of her" or try to remember how it felt when she appeared and as you hold that feeling try to talk to her. You need to realize how you connect to her.

> more times during the day
It's the quality that matters and not the quantity. But try anything that you feel might work. I know they are around you but you didn't manage to properly manifest it IRL and it is hard to feel outside of dreams and other coincidental events.

> sacrifices
Only if she says it helps or you think this will surely help.
Usually it's not the sacrifice that matters but the intent behind it.
 Like I can summon most entities with just merely reading what I need to sacrifice to them that gives me a feeling and others sacrificed so many in their name the excess amount of sacrificed material energies just let the entity appear before me with no effort if they are compatible with me. If they are not then I am glad that they are not that easy to summon. Even tho I feel their lingering presence already it's just I am not "pulling them in" if it's not necessary. 

> i need guidance among other things
I don't think you need to worship. The goddess and the Shinto princess and your sisters already acknowledged you. You need to get in touch with yourself and your power. As you said before your "mage powers" felt "inherent". You have to feel that. Remember how you learned to walk as a child? Remember how you first shat yourself? Then you learned to hold it in almost like it was an obvious reflex? How you learned to suck a tit or chew food?
This is how you learn inherent powers. Without forcing it but finally getting the "feel" how it needs to come out and let that "feel" guide how we need to move. Not easy I know. Especially because this is what I am doing atm. I can relate.

You have a pathworking way within you already and you have supporting entities and guides you cannot hear yet perfectly but aware of already. You just need to get in touch with them better.

> i have to figure out on my own
More or less but asking for a little help is not always bad 
 The shit my guides made me go through so I am willing to depend and get help from others. Urgh. My emotions can be the Tsunderestest thing ever. 
Don't forget you have to walk your path on your own but sometimes we need to ask for directions or accept some helping hands here and there.