/ashleyj/ - Ashley Jones

I should leave a comment on youtube and say I like her videos.
I shouldn't send her a picture of my arm with a slightly deeper cut in it every day until she makes a new video.

I should want her to make new videos.
I shouldn't want her to make a video in which she beheads me with a chainsaw for the Sinaloa cartel.

As a realist I'm slowly beginning to realize that she's not really interested in making any more vids for us. She was pretty much a minimalist and simplistic not interested in money or shopping at those high class supermarkets but everyone has their price. So why don't each of us that frequent this board each chip in $100,000. I'm sure she couldn't turn down the $1,000,000 offer.

 >>/4934/
your statement should be in the format of "I should ... I shouldn't ..."

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I should occasionally enjoy the deliciously refreshing taste of an ice cold Pepsi whilst watching her old videos.
I should not consume copious amounts of Pepsi in a desperate attempt to induce a diabetic coma that will transpose my mind back to 2015 when she was still around.

 >>/4935/
I know, but I'm a maverick, a nonconformist but in the interest of remaining in the good graces of board members:

I should offer to give her a sausage pizza every Friday in perpetuity to make more vids.

I shouldn't express my undying devotion to her if she'll make more vids for fear she'll think I'm a simp.

 >>/4940/
very good.  it may be too late but we can always make personal improvements

I should want to tell Ashton that pee's mustache is coming along nicely
I shouldn't want to rip Ashton's burrito dick off and eat it with cilantro and salsa verde

 >>/4940/
What a coincidence that you mention giving me pizza. When I come back I was planning on accepting pizza gift cards. You better keep up your end of this deal. Ashton needs to keep this weight on. I can't even look at a vegetable without a new alter fronting our system due to trauma. My protecting alter, Dakota (he/him), keeps us littles in the system safe when we see a vegetable. 'Course, what Dakota does with said vegetable is unspeakable. He's piled up so many soaked 'cumbers under the bed. 'Cumber+'gina=inedible 'cumber.  Dakota is telling me to stop writing this.

Jokes aside, I'm going to fucking hold you to this. Remember what you said. IN. PERPETUITY.

 >>/4943/
We cannot achieve perfection, we can only strive for it.

 >>/4948/
You got it, love of my life. I thought I was in the know but who pray tell is Dakota?

I should want to tell Ashley I'm sorry about her DID and hope she gets better soon.
I shouldn't ask Ashley to give me all Dakota's used cucumbers.

 >>/4950/
one of pee's alters, pay attention.

I should want to give Ashley a pizza
I shouldn't want to deliver it myself to her address
https://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/831762

 >>/4954/
oh that's recent.  can newgrounds of all things rise again?

I should want to give Ashley a high five.
I shouldn't want to steal her dirty socks and use them as covid masks.

 >>/4948/
What? You don't like dill pickles? You want, I should have Mordy jar those jerkin' gherkins? We can sell them down at the Hall of Cost in the delicatessen.

I should want to buy dinner for Ashley
I shouldn't want to search her trash for used tissues and keep them in my fridge

I should want to taste her warm Pepsi infused saliva on a cozy cold winter night.

I shouldn't want to play hangman with her while she picks her feet in Poughkeepsie.

 >>/4962/
 >>/4962/
okay Seabee, the point of this exercise is to help us separate our fantasies from the real world. we're trying to think about things that are good to do as fans of Ashley, and things that would be inappropriate behavior as strangers to Ashley.
for example, if you were a young lady who used to make videos on the internet, you would probably be glad to hear a "how do you do Ashley, I enjoy your videos" from a stranger on the street, but you might not be glad to be shown by the stranger a carving of your name that he made in his leg with a steak knife.
now try again. say something appropriate that you'd like to do with Ashley, and something that you've perhaps done or thought about doing that you now know is inappropriate and shouldn't do.

I should want to prove my love to Ashley
I shouldn't want to blow up the Guidestones over in Eberton

 >>/4965/
no that's a perfectly reasonable thing to want
go blow up the rest of it and I promise a new video on Ashley's behalf

 >>/4966/
Glowies are all over it now

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 >>/4967/
you know what to do

 >>/4968/
I should want to run over glowniggers with my car
I shouldn't want to refrain from crushing their skulls with my AT tires

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I think glowies are on to us

 >>/4971/
is that from his twitter knockoff?

I should want to have a cup of tea with Ashley.
I shouldn't want to make a cup of tea with Ashley's tampons.

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I should draw portraits of her
I should not have conversations with those portraits

 >>/5016/
very good.  and even if the portraits talk to you sometimes you have to have the discipline to refrain from talking back to them.

I should want to tell Ashton that he looks like a very handsome and masculine boy
I shouldn't want to lick Ashton's peach fuzz mustache

 >>/5083/
I should want to compliment Ashton for his new facial hair.
I shouldn't want to reenact the shaving scene from the classic scientology movie Phenomenon. 

https://youtube.com/watch?v=pYlPKnNnhaw

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 >>/5083/
> I shouldn't want to lick Ashton's peach fuzz mustache

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 >>/5088/
I should want to enjoy Ashley's cooking.
I shouldn't want to hunt down the worthless dregs of society to butcher for our dinners.

Or should I?

 >>/5091/
mmmmmmmm good thinking

I should want to eat Ashley's gourmet hotdogs
I shouldn't want her to cut off and eat my hotdog

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 >>/5091/
 >>/5092/

I should want to enjoy Ashley's cooking.
I shouldnt accept whatever the hell this abomination of a meal is, even if does include your daily whole grains.

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 >>/5093/
> it's g-good

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 >>/5093/
if ash made that for me and told me to eat it... i would.

Lucky for her, I know how to cook, like her father. Probably cook better than her father. Her father would probably like my cooking tbh. I had a black guy and his nephew tell me I made the best chicken they ever had and the Mexicans that used to live across from me caught me making Birria once because they could smell it and lost their shit because they didn't know the white guy next door could throw down like they family do. Birria is one of my favorite things. I usually have it with some ramen in the birria broth. I be grillin' and making giant pizzas in a wood-fired brick oven in the backyard too. I do it all in the kitchen. I blame Youtube. I used to think food network was cool but then I realized most celebrity chefs are hacks watching those same YouTube videos. I also clean.

 >>/5146/
Should chicken be eaten with the fingers or should the fingers be eaten separately?