Hello, Agathians. I am here because people in my wholesome server alerted me to gossip being spread about me in this thread.
Being a man who values honor, dignity, and truth, I am here to help clear up some potential rumors and misinformation that might be spread about in these sacred halls, as well as tell you a bit about myself.
1) I am 36, a husband of (currently) 1, and a father of (currently) 2. We are a very cute and happy family.
2) I have stable housing and income. Most of my income is made being a professional fry cook at Popeye's Chicken, and dealing drugs. We are not on any government assistance. But you can bet your ass I will be getting them foodstamp gibs when I decide to take the time to apply for them. I will be purchasing large wheels of cheese with American tax monies.
3) I beat and raped my wife. Why? Well, it started when she got my 3DS banned from wifi because she is a filthy fucking hacker and the game detected her using illegal Pokémon. Rightfully enraged, I punched her in the face. And rightfully turned on, I raped her as well. She shouldn't have worn that sexy black dress and looked all weak and helpless and shit. I am only a man, I can only resist this succubus so much. If women did not want to be beat and raped, they really should look so sexy when they are afraid and vulnerable.
4) I purposely and constantly pursure underage girls because I wish to find women who are not whored out and broken to start a harem... Considering my worth as a man, this is an incredibly generous offer and amazing opportunity. Unfortunately, all the girls 15-17 have been broken and defiled. Yes, weep, oh yee of this foresaken generation. For I can speak with certainty that all the men of this generation are completely shit out of luck on finding a wife who isn't a busted and broken ho'. There is no hope. Give up.
5) I can confirm Geeg is indeed one of these broken and busted hoes... But worse than this, dating her is a dreadfully boring experience. I shall demonstrate what a typical conversation was like...
Me: Stop being just a fucking dumb and boring bitch.
Geeg:
> I'm sorry
> I'm sorry
> I'm sorry
> complains about how miserable she is
> sends low effort videos of herself paddling her ass with a hairbrush(there was seriously no energy to her swings)
Upon closer inspection of the nudes she had sent me, I can confirm she has no ass.
Truly, nothing of value was lost when I dumped her. Even her threads are boring.
6) I am a Dragon and a God. This is no God complex, if you do not see me for what I am I can confirm you are either
A) In denial
B) Lack context and understanding
C) Are retarded
7) I am a Nazi Monarchist. Monoarchy is the only answer. Democracy is retarded because people are retarded. Thus, it is an inherently broken and worthless system.
8) I have no weaknesses. Come at me with everything you got. All your spears and swords shall hit my scales as if they were made of straw. I am immortal.
9) I am smarter than all of you. 4chan cannot stop me. Agatha(endchan? Idfk. I don't use this shithole) cannot stop me. Discord cannot stop me. Enraged armies of incels and hysterical whores cannot stop me. The law cannot stop me. I cannot even stop myself. I have tried by calling police on myself and cofessing to being a wife beating rapist... To which the officers responded with "You're a lucky man." And "Congratulations." And then they left.
I am simply going to do as I please, unopposed, for the rest of my life