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Went to take a shit before but could only manage a piss. An extra squirt shot out as I stood up and now my jocks and trackies are soaked with piss.
 >>/718966/
If it's IP rate limiting, there's probably not much you can do except change IPs. Otherwise, you can maybe cycle through a list of random user-agent strings for each request.
 >>/718975/
Why not just pay for a subscription to the footy stream?
I got the impression the other night that ProjectionistNEET had paid for YouTube Red or whatever to stream some of that Cobra Kai stuff.
 >>/719009/
Probably a leb. Any neet on the east coast should be pretty suspect for that reason. All sorts of fucking God knows what creatures out that way.
stinky farts. can tell its going to be a corny, painful poo. 
my gums also keep bleeding in the shower 
might be liver failure due to gooning
 >>/719050/
They pirate a lot the first 2 seasons, it's quite a fun show if you don't take it seriously, more comic than tv sort of thing.
The first few episodes are fucking awful though, I would have given up except for a reccomendation but it improves a lot very fast.
 >>/719097/
I fell asleep watching tv and then went to bed and then got out of bed about an hour later and drank the 2/5ths of a bottle left and want more.
I am running out of steam on the allnighter. Got goosebumps and I've only been up for 12 hours. 
You gooners have got me feeling like gooning the day away
Cat woke me up three times tonight, then tripped me over begging for food, then bit me, then started howling at furniture.
 >>/719117/
The troons cats woke him up too, because for some reason he isn't comfortable leaving them in this room with me during the night, despite locking them in here previously. 
Strange unit that cunt
I didnt end up needing a new graphics card in low profile form factor, i just needed the driver. 
I have a spare low profile card but a tiny thing tore off, its the size of an ant, i think its a resistor, ummmmmm........
double cheesy b meal with additional large fries for breaky
chips are cold 
drive thru girls werent cute
I don't remember anyone linking the most recent edition of Janas creative writing.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12225239/What-attractive-job-Jana-Hocking-names-red-flag-professions-avoids-Sydney.html

> I had another friend go on a date with an 'entrepreneur' #redflag. 
> She thought it meant he had multiple businesses and was perhaps a savvy tech genius. Nope, it was just code word for lazy and jobless. That's why I think we need to put more weight in asking future love prospects what they do for a living.
 >>/719128/
my cat is nothing like that 
he's a fucking demon 
for 2 full hours each day, he goes full schizo 
runs around the house, bumps into everything, and attacks anyone/anything
mind you, those 2 hours are never in a row 
if I go in the balcony (it's an open one) he follows me, and picks up bugs 
then he carries the fucking bugs in my shoes 
he often doesn't even kill them, he just handicaps them until they can't move properly anymore 
then he gets bored he lets them die in pure agony 
now and then I go to sleep 
he meows at the door while I'm asleep 
he's not hungry
he doesn't even want to be petted 
as soon as I open the goddamn door he runs as fast as he can from me
then I go back to sleep, only for this shit to happen again and again 
you can't even pet him, unless he's asleep, or almost asleep
Rescheduled yesterday's phone call to this morning. 
Slept in. 
Woke up to it ringing and the CEO of another company was trying to arrange a meeting but I couldn't hear myself speak properly and tried to turn on the charm but it was too late so all that happened is half way through spluttering about my poor scheduling I started talking like a calm George Clooney. 
I think she said she'd email me. 
Too early for this shit.
 >>/719156/
Had another call from another coordinator telling me that I'm signing up a client and a worker. 
This one knows I'm a mong so it's okay. 
I hung out with her trucky husband while he had a sesh a few years ago.
my cat's real name is ted 
despite of that, I always call him nigga or satană (satan) because he annoys me 
anyway, I was listening to this for the first time in fucking months https://youtube.com/watch?v=z7rxl5KsPjs
he was sleeping 
as soon as I pressed play, he woke up 
not only that, but as I was listening he stared at me for the whole time  
I start to think my cat is actually satan help
does holy water work? 
I might get some if I go to church 
haven't been to one in years, but I guess preachers are willing to give holy water for special cases
 >>/719174/
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
please help me 
the internet is dead 
search engines don't waork 
I can't find af ucking picture of wat a protectives hield shoukd look like
 >>/719177/
Solomonic seals. 
Do not post them here. 
Monk posting facial emojis, repetitively, is why his father figure is going to cut his dick off.  
You won't see the effects or the cost until you've squandered the reward.
Romanian, how did you find this board? How did a fellow gooner stumble into our secluded goon garden? 
I wonder how many foreigners browse this board but never post because its not for them
Also, they disrupt balance. 
Invoking a seal to give you vigour might result in a shorter life, one for confidence may manifest as ego and isolation, sexual prowess may result in infertility. 
It all balances out and often snaps back to an equilibrium violently.
A more appropriate thing would be getting the cat to calm down might result in it avoiding and losing interest in you. 
You get what you want.
 >>/719181/
> Romanian, how did you find this board?
I have no home, is etter than most places on tje imnnternet
> How did a fellow gooner stumble into our secluded goon garden?
2020 some fag on /r9k. mentioned tjis place
I blocked most sites I usually og to because they hav e too mnay cia niigers 
now I'm here 
> I wonder how many foreigners browse this board but never post because its not for them
plen ty I suppose
 >>/719201/
Just did. Ran out of paper so wet yesterday's undies and used it as a rag. 
Needed another shit as soon as I stood up so used a sock. 
Holeproof explorers are not as soft as they seem.
https://www.news.com.au/finance/business/technology/indias-most-successful-startup-byjus-is-in-crisis/news-story/2176c591a8916b4cd791ab7aef8b359d
In the community, at a reputable health service centre.
Need another shit.
All those zingers yesterday have my guts in turmoil.
Mummybot came into my lair while I was on torlet and saw the neetboard and a bunch of tabs open about sex positions
If they did a remake of bmx bandits the kids would get bashed and have their bikes stolen by "youths" in the first 10 minutes.
I wonder if supervillain henchmaning pays well.
They do get beat up a lot but apart from that they seem to sit round in lairs all the time.
Weber should just become a cyber criminal. Rent out a couple apartments in a mid tier Laotian city and cycle between them. Selling CVV dumps and buying natural gas futures. Sending us pics of the little jungle bunnies he stumbled upon, getting six packs of Beerlao delivered by one of his trusted henchmen, ceiling fan squeaking as the sounds of motorbike traffic and the smell of fried noodles drifts in through the open 2nd story window. Bum gun replaces the chux, motherbat gets mysterious packages full of US dollars every now and then. Bill tells a tall tale about how his brother in law slipped into the underworld.
 >>/719307/
A neet was once employed as a henchman. Mad villains tend to have very short attention spans and forget they've even hired you, you sit around all day doing nothing, then one day they storm in and send everyone on a bizarre and poorly concieved adventure. The hero beats you up in a halfhearted fashion because they don't want the villain to get better henchmen, so you ask go back to the lair to watch TV while the villain runs away sooking and isn't seen for a month. 
You've got to feed the cat and water pot plants.
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Went to teh servo and got some gummy life savers and three chokito bars (expiry 9/2020) for tonights moofie. What time is the premiere Air Crash Investigations?
 >>/719323/
The pay is bad but because you're just on call most henchmen do freelance call centre work, iron laundry or train animals as a side hustle. As long as it looks reasonably dastardly when the boss storms through the door. 
You've got to wear the same uniform even if it makes no sense, but it's tax deductible.
Half a kilo of refried BEANS in bourittos. Going to eat another half kilo in bourito bowl plus a black BEAN salad. Then tomorrow morning another half a kilo in quesaladas.

There's a bank around the corner that has a huge revolving door, by the time they realize it will be too late
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Hey fellas.
Gonna stream Fantomas vs. Scotland Yard on Saturday at 7pm AEST. I belive this is the 
second episode of the Fantomas trilogy, we watched the first one already.
It will be on Endcorner, not Womboflix:
https://cytu.be/r/endcorner
 >>/719358/
As soon as I woke up I reached for my goon glass and was struck by an attack of introspection and self-awareness that I am currently attempting to drown.
Our moon is so useless and pathetic compared to all of the cool moons out there in the solar system. While so much other moons have all these cool features, all our Moon did was hit us, and then get a free ride orbiting us for a few billion years.

Europa is such a cool moon, that it could potentially have liquid water underneath. The gravitational effects of its planet Jupiter, and some of Jupiter's other Moons (including Ganymede, a moon so sick, it is bigger than the planet Mercury, and almost as big as Mars; Callisto, another huge ass moon bigger than ours, one that might even have water as well; and Io, a pizza coloured moon with fucking sulfuric volcanoes) cause internal movement for the body, meaning there might not only be the biggest ocean currently known in the universe there, but it could very well have geothermic vents. Geothermic vents mean that there could potentially be life there! Our stupid ass moon can't do none of that shit, it's just barren.

How about Titan? Easily the biggest moon of Saturn, it is so big its gravity helps Saturn's smaller moons from crashing into the ringed planet - it is literally saving their lives! Could our moon do that? Nah, it's too pathetic to do anything of the sort. Not only that, but it is the only moon with a proper greenhouse effect going on, it literally has an atmosphere, and oceans made out of liquid methane (and some scientists think there might even be water). Could our moon have an atmosphere? The flimsy little dust bubble it has around it hardly counts, it's so shit.

Look at our friend Triton. It was a dwarf planet in its own right, and not only any dwarf planet, but the largest one, bigger than Pluto and Eris. However, the poor thing was brutally captured by Neptune, and is now in a orbit around the planet, going the opposite way from the other moons to show its uniqueness. It also has geysers that throw out gaseous nitrogen that it carries around in it, creating its own atmosphere, and making it one of the 4 places in the solar system with known geological activity, apart from the Earth, Io and Saturn's Enceladus (that motherfucker is covered in fresh ice and it's of the shiniest things in the solar system, cos it erupts water vapour). Could OUR moon have geological activity? Of fucking course not.

Even Charon is cooler than the moon, and it doesn't even orbit a real planet. Its around half the size of Pluto, and its so massive, it actually makes Pluto wobble around a point outside of Pluto itself, making it more of a duo-planetary system then a moon. It affects the environment so much scientists say that the other moons, rather than orbiting Pluto, orbit a Pluto-Charon system. Can our tiny-ass moon do that? No it can't.

So anyways, fuck the moon.
Someone followed my github repo for the first time ☺️

 >>/719363/
I will have another look, after I finish (or abandon) this project. 

 >>/719367/
Makes me miss gooning and smoking in my old flat, just sitting on the couch looking at the walls 

 >>/719387/
Ryan uploaded a new pic
I read a book called Seveneves about the moon getting blown up.
It was a very good book but the ending was a bit shit.
 >>/719413/
> Someone followed my github repo for the first time ☺️
Probably Weber so his students had something to laugh at in his secure coding lecture.
 >>/719416/
That was a good book. I liked how each 'eve' represented a different race and the obvious jew being the villan race that blocked the space ring thing.
I dislike that I can only find someone discussing this on reddit.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Unicode/comments/v4m1u2/why_is_the_ministry_of_endowments_and_religious/
 >>/719436/
Unicode 8 also hosts a roster of 72 Face emojis. Mirroring the 72 Demonic sigils possibly gifted to the Queen by Solomon. Even the Unicode emojis resemble the 72 Seals themselves before the final layer of polish is put over the top of them See the Seal of Agares vs the quintessential smiley face emoji here.

Every time we use an emoji we channel the essence of demons. Kings and Princes of Hell reflect the Seals that bind them from our sight and from being able to speak directly to us in these marketable, seemingly innocent little faces in our phone.
The old lady up the road who I good samaritan for just called me and had a ree about me being a neet then hung up when I said I was pretty comfy. At least i know she'd call me if she flunks. 
Really.
 >>/719457/
I stopped having coffee with my neighbour because she got angry at me for confusing one of her dead relatives I never met with another in one of her tales.
 >>/719455/
she saw some shit on the MSM about there being a lot of demand for forklift drivers and i suppose it causes her anxiety that I'm here living my best life shirking work. However if I go then who's gonna clean the black mold off her ceiling?
 >>/719483/
If we buy somewhere that is just land Tiffin is going to be busy cutting spars for us to build, then Webby and Bill will have to do the internal outfit to get us to the lockup stage.
https://www.news.com.au/national/nsw-act/news/william-tyrells-foster-mother-could-be-charged-with-missing-toddlers-disappearance/news-story/4d38e8d2a45d0290577c1e0a5bb88ebd
about time
https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/food/why-kfc-wont-be-hiking-prices-like-other-businesses/news-story/38a634be5b5786919ef4457cd8d33adc
good people
 >>/719493/
> Dolans is very expensive.
Yeah them and HJs are not worth it anymore. A sausage mcfuggin meal with a coffee is okay occasionally, but any of the proper boig meals are a ripoff.
 >>/719510/
I retired to the couchbed. Uncomfortably cold taking my hoodie and socks off, but they’d have no effect in the morning if I slept in them under the doona.
Spent too long searching online for something that never existed. Pissed off. Frustrated. Going to buy the cheapest heater that BigW(eber) has to offer. Shouldn't have had that coffee at 4(four) this arvo. It's going to be another all nighter. I blame Cruisey. As I do for all life's problems.
 >>/719528/
But it was a wise decision to use a can opener, mongs usually stressful the lid open and cut themselves.
Mongs also can't open a can with the swiss army knife opener,
https://www.news.com.au/sport/american-sports/lsu-fan-goes-viral-after-being-brutally-rejected-amid-wild-celebrations/news-story/e83d9257e3574b039eb811428eca4cc2
disgusting bitch
https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/incidents/tourist-dies-trying-to-drink-all-21-cocktails-on-bar-menu/news-story/561db0e95d01e916eb6ec2db5318b985
lightweight
Awake. Feel sick. Too much grog it would seem.
Had some juice and panadol. Having a coffee.
Going to play some more Skyrim.
https://www.news.com.au/national/victoria/crime/cctv-emerges-after-14yearold-ethan-hoac-mowed-down-and-stabbed-to-death-in-melbourne/news-story/9e84c5b5e7ff040b4b9a10a262991e53
I'm sure he was totally "sweet" and wasn't involved in drug dealing or some other organised crime. Totally normal for people to drive around in SUVs with face masks and knives.
https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/incidents/fitness-star-rejected-from-boarding-flight-from-sydney-to-bali/news-story/83239a8dd969652f46e1d8422b50cfc5
If I worked the counter at the international arrival or departure thingo, I'd be messing with these vapid cunts every chance I got
 >>/719591/
"Originally, the expression referred to a method of treating a rabid dog bite; hair from the dog was placed in the wound. So in that sense, having another drink (any drink) is like taking hair from the dog that bit you."

I don't understand what the relation to beer is with rabies?
 >>/719592/
I don't mean like that, just things like having a crinkled passport or them having too much makeup on or different hair to the photo etc. No flight for you!
 >>/719595/
This Kosher nationalism always pisses me off. Even if this gay little region were to split off from Russia or whatever it would just join the EU and flood the country with biomass from Apefrica. Same as the Irish. Brits out, blacks in.
 >>/719599/
> Same as the Irish. Brits out, blacks in.
Amazing to think that that was what the IRA was fighting for all those years. Niggers and trannies.
https://www.news.com.au/finance/work/at-work/victoria-police-looking-into-claims-officers-identifying-as-gender-neutral-for-extra-1300-allowance/news-story/ab85868602ca99251b4aff14ae55d5ff
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I'm not satisfied in the slightest with the technique progress I made in the past few months 
moreover, I cached 2 colds in a spawn of 1 week (first time when I'm getting sick in 7 months) 
thinking about quitting the internet for 1 week, taking cold showers, joining the wagon, and practicing 6 hours daily  
if I don't get drunk enough to forget about it, I might start tomorrow
 >>/719620/
One wonders why the Police Union even allowed the discrepancy to exist in the first place. Surely practical work bras don't cost that much more that women need an extra $1300 a year?
The woe and anxiety and fear continue. But I'm still alive somehow and need to do something with the rest of the day. But what?
https://www.kidspot.com.au/parenting/my-wife-pooshames-me-on-a-daily-basis-and-im-fed-up/news-story/5f4aa4fe2a84f36e13ed60f9d30464f3
I thought my old phone was dead, I've been trying to get it to charge for a day and it wouldn't but I took the sim card out and now it seems to be charging up.
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NEETs I am going to be unavailable for a period of time. The board will be in the hands of my trusted deputies during that time. Thank you.
I have reduced the hourly thread creation limit from 6 to 1 during this period of potential raids. Please keep that in mind when it is time for a new thread.
If we have one (1) BO and he has at least two (2) deputies and there is only four (4) NEETs then that last NEET needs some watching.
 >>/719635/
Or a Belgian backpacker

https://www.news.com.au/national/grave-concern-for-belgian-tourist-missing-in-tasmania-after-unattended-car-found-near-bushland-track/news-story/b0b6a82291aed57a798f902389a5f3e1
 >>/719617/
I love winter 
like actual fucking winter with -10 degrees and 1+ meter of snow 
staying at home all say, looking outside at the snow 
putting wood every couple of hours in the stove so you don't freeze to death 
eating half frozen food, and hot chocolate 
waiting for the electricity to come back as you wonder if you'll make it till spring comes 
going to sleep with 2 hoodies, 3 sweaters, a hat, and socks just to wake up in the middle of the night shaking from cold 
realizing that your food just ran out and you can't get anything for the next fuck knows how many days because a snow storm is loose
no insects to buzz around 
it's those little things that make you love winter
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Made too much salad as usual but I might add some kalamata olives to it and a simple dressing of a lime bit of sugar and salt.
 >>/719634/
read books you don't even care about to keep you mind busy
schizo rant here or on small facebook groups for the keks 
get a telescope and spy on your neighbors to the point where you learn all their habits
open the bible at random and take it as a prediction of your future  
goon 
yell at the sky 
the possibilities are endless my fren
 >>/719684/
I'd much rather say than I'm masturbating 10 times a day to r34 optimus primes and chuck norris than to admit I have a girlfriend and be forced to elaborate on that 
do what you please with this information
I went out with a short,chubby,catholic Romanian girl for a while.
She was quite nice but her whole family was insane.
 >>/719701/
here's some romania 101 
> every boomer is a mild schizo 
> every boomer is a shut in extremist 
> nobody likes gypsies (gypsies included)
> except for actual schizos, everyone brags about stealing 
> catholics are the equivalent of hippies in the usa 
> everyone is broke 
> zoomers can't talk for longer than 30 seconds without shitting their sentence with an english word (somehow their english still sucks)
> You now need to do an Employability Skills Training course. This activity will help you build skills and knowledge that can help you get a job. If you haven't already, booking this course will also earn you 30 bonus points towards your points target.

Has anyone done this? It says it takes 3 weeks and is 25 hours per week. What le fug
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Tonight we'll be watching the first episode of Boardwalk Empire, about an Atlantic City politician who plays both sides of the law by conspiring with gangsters during the Prohibition era.

On Saturday Chris Hemsworth kills a bunch of guys in Extraction 2 (2023), and on Sunday we have The Princess Bride (1987)
 >>/719733/
I'm finally getting fur elise down without a shitload of breaks in the hard part 
I might be able to play it decently without the metronome soon
It was basic oh&s stuff,don't swear at people,wear clean clothes and love homos and trannies and muslims in the workplace.
I know you guys said to just type woed, but it still doesn't feel like it's enough 
the only people I get along with live upside down on the other side of the globe (except for the hungry guy) 
I'm so drunk to cope with the loneliness, that I don't even know what I was trying to say
now and them I get so drunk  I can't type properly anymore, but for the most part I don't fuck up too many words
Nope, phone was only pretending to charge up and now won't even give me the red charging light.
I think she's dead.
Learning mongodb. It's nice to just use objects instead of writing queries but also kind of annoying. 

 >>/719775/
- Organise vile pile 
- Help mummybot with scanning document 
- Air in car tyres 
- Delete crap in Downloads/Pictures folder 
- Gym 
- Clean up outdoor room

That's mine. Hope it inspires you
neighbour was outside with his push mower, grimacing at me when I came back home with wine
my front lawn is now about 2 feet high, with some thistles that are about 5 feet high here and there
Apparently phones are only meant to last 3-6 years and I got nearly 9 years out of that one.
I'm calling that a win.
 >>/719790/
I respect Cruisey he is all bootstraps.
https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/health/health-problems/surgeon-reveals-people-have-been-pooing-wrong/news-story/db9f49b89856daf9093863c63540eaa1
shout out to the squatty potty neets
 >>/719793/
> His past medical public service announcements have included tips on gauging someone’s penis length without a ruler and reasons to never hold in farts.
https://www.news.com.au/national/nsw-act/news/woolworths-shoppers-watch-in-horror-as-violent-brawl-breaks-out-in-deli-section/news-story/a64d50ac88ba71e493d78ed4ebb8d4f8
https://www.news.com.au/entertainment/music/tours/mistake-taylor-swift-fans-are-making-when-trying-to-buy-tickets/news-story/eca0b63a187302323381db5d844fb778
> Professor of IT has never heard of cookies
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-06-28/southern-cassowary-endangered-federal-draft-recovery-plan/102531682
big ol' murder bird
 >>/719792/
> Apparently phones are only meant to last 3-6 years
Most major brands support them for five years. Then unless they get kicked in the arse, they won't do anymore patches. Updates can be important
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pegasus_(spyware)
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In 1 hour we will be watching Boardwalk Empire on womboflix. In 30 minutes, we'll watch a bit of the documentary Running With The Devil, about the life of John McAffee. https://cytu.be/r/womboflix
I was tempted to get drinking at only 9am this morning but resisted the urge until 2:30pm. Ate 500g of pork mince in one sitting however. You win some, you lose some.
 >>/719859/
I've been on it since 2(two)pm. About to do what I've been putting off all day and change a sink washer, take out the bins, shower then resume drinking until Point of Passout.
"Self is contextual and performative. There is no true self, there are only situational selves constructed for a particular audience.

In particular, there is a self we construct purely internally, which is its own audience. Most confuse the internal performance for the 'true self.'"
My mong-Oh!db queries are finally working. The logic suddenly came to me while I was eating din dins. 
Arm workout soon. 
Much more productive day than that poofer alcoholic Cruisedog
about 5 minutes until the moofie-neets return pretending how good the shitshow was. don't believe them.
 >>/719913/
They have the most boring conversations watching the most awful films and then act as though they are more cultured adn refined than us. It reminds me of how nuro would come here to call us all losers before getting high in a commercial toilet.
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They say that we got rights, and we need em! 
But they're takin away, all of our freedom! 
First they outlaw dope! 
Now out in Melbourne you can't even light up a fuckin smoke!
I make sure to stare at tranny's with disgust when I see them in public. I want them to know that they don't pass and are disgusting.

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