do you have a good system not to be overwhelmed by all the stuff you try to do? would love to have serious discussion on time management in case anyone is interested. maybe i am not the only one feeling strange for wasting the limited time of this short life. i actually found stuff that helped me but more on that later itt!

i tried to do without for a long time and did not get done all that much. wasted a lot of time on video games, though it was not a complete waste. i noticed the same complications over and over again when i try to make better use of my time. here is a list of them:

> mood
sometimes i make plans to do something the next day but then i get molested or stalked or attacked in some way or someone paints graffiti on my car and i am just depressed and i assumed i wasn't going to be but and then i feel like i can't continue

> various amount of energy
some days i feel strong, other days i feel weak

> unrealistic idea of time
sometimes i look at what i want to do and it is so much that i lose hope or get intimidated and believe it is impossible, then at other times i am in a flow state i have unlimited energy and can do anything

> forgetting
some times i realize that i had just forgotten to do something i wanted to do

> sheer volume of things
when all i would want to accomplish was 5 things, i could easily not get overwhelmed but when i notice 100 things that are all shit and i know i could make them better if i focussed on them, i feel like it is impossible to make a dent. 

> interruptions
sometimes i am doing something and then something comes in between and the entire project becomes derailed and i never pick it up to continue again

> wandering mind
sometimes i am doing something and for the first time in days i don't feel dead inside and i have all these other thoughts and some of them i instantly want to follow and others i don't want to forget so i try to take notes but i don't know where and then i become scattered and in the end almost nothing gets done

> not finishing
sometimes i do something and for reasons unbeknownst to me i just decide not to finish and then i never pick it up and the project just sits in a box by my bed and i stub my toe on it

> not finishing and instead starting something else 
that's even worse. that's not even reducing the number of open projects to one less, that's opening up a new one so in total that's two more!

> idea for unstarted ideas
sometimes while i do something i get an idea for something else i have not even started yet and since i already have too much going on in the head, i knew i was gonna forget it and not find it in the moment i would continue to work on the thing.

> calendar doesnt work
i tried using a paper calendar and it just became an awful chore to keep crossing out stuff i ended up not doing and writing it on another day or even worse trying to have the calendar be a diary of things i actually did and then there were entire days i completely forget i was using a calendar or where i just couldn't do anything or didn't want to which then made me feel strange to carry around a book where half the pages are blank.