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Stories from the Böhmerwald edition

> Current and upcoming races

06.08 - 17.08 Volta a Portugal em Bicicleta 2.1
12.08 - 14.08 Tour de Pologne Women 2.1 WE
12.08 - 16.08 PostNord Tour of Denmark 2.Pro
14.08 - 17.08 Czech Tour 2.1
15.08 - 17.08 Tour de Romandie Féminin 2.WWT
15.08 Grote Prijs Yvonne Reynders 1.1 WE
15.08 Circuit Franco-Belge 1.Pro
17.08 La Polynormande 1.1
17.08 ADAC Cyclassics 1.UWT
19.08 - 22.08 Tour du Limousin-Périgord - Nouvelle Aquitaine 2.1
20.08 - 24.08 Lidl Deutschland Tour 2.Pro
20.08 - 24.08 Renewi Tour 2.UWT
21.08 GP Lucien Van Impe 1.1 WE
23.08 - 14.09 La Vuelta Ciclista a España 2.UWT
26.08 - 29.08 Tour Poitou - Charentes en Nouvelle Aquitaine 2.1
27.08 Muur Classic Geraardsbergen 1.1
28.08 Kreiz Breizh Elites Féminin 1.1 WE
30.08 Classic Lorient Agglomération - CERATIZIT 1.WWT
31.08 Bretagne Classic - Ouest-France 1.UWT
02.09 - 07.09 Simac Ladies Tour 2.WWT
02.09 - 07.09 Lloyds Bank Tour of Britain Men 2.Pro
06.09 Maryland Cycling Classic 1.Pro
06.09 Maryland Cycling Classic Women 1.1
07.09 GP Industria & Artigianato 1.Pro
08.09 - 09.09 Tour of Binzhou 2.1
09.09 - 14.09 Tour Cycliste Féminin International de l'Ardèche 2.1 WE
10.09 Giro della Toscana - Memorial Alfredo Martini 1.1
11.09 Gran Premio città di Peccioli - Coppa Sabatini 1.Pro

> Mecha-Rusbert's webm folders:

https://pastebin.com/Xjeg9zf7

> Bert van Koers' ciclismo quizzes:

https://www.sporcle.com/user/Bert_van_Koers/quizzes/

> Races info:

https://www.procyclingstats.com/
https://firstcycling.com/

> Free streams:

https://tiz-cycling-live.io/
https://cycling.today/live-streaming/
https://thedaddy.dad/

> Velodrama league code:

51196855

Previous thread:
 >>/35341/


































































































 >>/36474/
had the same experience but at this point I'll prefer a systematic low reading to complete drop outs in every hard effort
at least it will have to do til a replacement can be procured




Honestly power reading is usually enough. Unless I'm raping, there I really need another number to focus on, I usually go without hr

















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in other nieuws he's hiring again. definitely don't flood this form or anything.

> You have to have the curiosity to find out from which direction the Galibier will be hit this year, whether or not Sean Kelly finished stage 4 of the Route du Sud 1994. Do you recognize yourself in this? Then this job might be something for you. 
im sure many berts qualify. WFH PCS spreadsheet jobber probably pays more then traindriving.
















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I'm back, it was kinda lame
Before I pay attention, let me just say how much I loathe the cagies who spend HOURS and HOURS every week stuck in traffic. Today I was one of them since Praga still doesn't have a functioning ring, but i can't imagine doing this every morning, every afternoon, for YEARS
And yet the cagies are more than happy to do it, but god forbid some brave cyclist slows them down for one (one) second

> The situation could change in the next hour, but right now, six teams, Lidl-Trek, Canyon SRAM, EF Education-Oatly, AG Insurance Soudal, Visma-Lease a Bike and Team Picnic PostNL, will be technically disqualified from the race ahead of the TT after a disagreement with the UCI over new rules surrounding the use of rider tracking systems within the race.

> It appears the argument was about the use of the new safety tracking system, with the UCI imposing new regulations on the teams without proper consultation. The teams tried to find a compromise and asked that the UCI appoint one rider from each team to use the equipment, but the UCI refused to select the riders and then required the teams to fit the technology to the bikes themselves.

per dnlbenson. UCI is insisting they install the devices, teams want to either install the devices themselves or have the UCI be liable if any damages happen if they are installed improperly and cause chutes/bike damage/etc. great trial run guys can't wait for WC.





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Horyshit got shitfaced with a late return first time since years.
I think I got home before 5 in the morning, people were starting to move to work already.
Too old for this shit, although I am not knocked out for the whole day, the day will be unproductive THOUGH.
Off with me mom to the cemetery, I will provide shits in 2 hours or so.









we live in Suisse. this is a world tour race btw. 
DNS Canyon//Sram zondacrypto
DNS EF Education – Oatly
DNS Lidl –Trek
DNS Team Picnic PostNL
DNS Team Visma | Lease a Bike



 >>/36530/
> The decision to implement this test of GPS safety tracking technology was made by SafeR, the structure dedicated to safety in women’s and men’s road cycling, bringing together representatives of all road cycling’s stakeholders
plugge DNS'd his own team kwak








Statement by the disqualified teams: 

> We made clear that:

> We would not select a rider ourselves, nor install, remove, or maintain the device.

> The UCI or its partner was free to select a rider and install the device at their own liability if they believe they are in their right to do so.

> The reason why they don’t want to nominate a rider themselves is still unknown and unanswered.

i dont entirely understand this. what the fuck are they doing? how is this possibly a big enough deal that it leads to DSQ?


 >>/36541/
to be honest if they install this shit and some frame cracks and chutes the peleton because of them the UCI would never recover
better DSQ them to avoid taking responsibility


 >>/36543/
is that really a risk with this system, are they drilling a hole in the frame or something? unless its an asinine system the minor risk would be worth it for avoiding this media shitstorm.


 >>/36522/
I thought I was, it was surely before 12 o'clock when we decided to go to one of my guys place at literally the other end of town. Haven't been there since I am not visiting these leftover people too often, it is still pretty early, GREAT plan.
Then I am checking the clock on a display in the cab and it is 1 FUCKING 20.
Then there was going back home a pied which luckily sobered me up a bit.
Oh yeah, and people weren't going to work in the morning, it is a public holiday today.

Anyways, back to the /cyc/ labor camp, KL /cyc/.
















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having a looksie at the UCI management committee. there is no way these people are real. 

https://www.uci.org/members-mangement-committee/7zYeHYG0yhUYhW8zOWWhZL

> Ms Yuan Yuan serves as Deputy Secretary General of the Chinese Cycling Association and is currently Vice President of the Asian Cycling Confederation (ACC).
Yuan Yuan? are you fucking kidding me? her photo is obviously AI.






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Slav tv randomly just broadcasting czech tour.
Commentator is just some guy who they found under a bridge somwhere and has obviously never watched a day of cycling before today. He is mostly just silent. 
Very bizarre. I wonder who decided this is the race they should get the broadcasting rights for.































































































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> the annoying childless old foid in the flat below us tried to remove a wasp nest from her roller shutter box by banging the shutters up and down and now there's an extremely angry swarm of wasps in front of the entire house
We should just send all childless women over the age of 40 into asylums.





























































 >>/36727/
kek
however if i was a doper I would upload every race with full data but decreasing the power number by a certain %. Either through the powermeter itself if it allows that or by editing every head unit file. Much better strategy than hiding it all like the top dogs imo





 >>/36735/
don't these guys just know anyway based on their data and then comparing times
I assume they can guess weight pretty well
Always found that visma shit of valter gathering data such bullshit













Hey, top 10 is up.
Comicale for me to adjust out Tiller and Venturini just to have my whole team shit it up completely.
Such is 2025.








> abrahamsen attacks like 4 times during the race
> does all the work in the front group
> peleton reaches them due to shitty timekeeping
> outsprints all of them anyway

what kind of dope is this dude on, he was one of the worst riders in the classics season and suddenly he's glowing again
































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 >>/36525/
I have decided not to give in to this bullying. Maybe your country should have an actual .UWT race.


I'm having a very nice Muscadet Sevre-et-Maine from La Pepiere. This is one of the great cheap wines of the world.













 >>/36804/
could be a good WC. hypothetically at least. but this koers seems designed for a 60k pogsolo and we all know memco is washed and vingogo doesnt bring his bloodbags to one-days

 >>/36806/
I'm going to go on a limp and say that pogiwinslol is actually not that likely. His team is shit and he's basically going to ride against everybody. Mercxx lost a lot of wc like this





 >>/36807/
this year is so ridiculously hard that if anything its easier for him to win then last year. 6000 vertical meters and the circuit has multiple 15%+ pinches. no one will be left in the peloton to pull him back in the last 80k. I don't expect more then 30 finishers, the glasgow course was a babies version of this [albeit raining] and was super attritional

 >>/36812/
this, he'll just race like RVV but then it's even harder
every lap riders dropped from attrition and others kill themselves trying to follow him (jorgenson)
he will finish with 3 minutes on the next guy (o'connor who everyone forgot)




 >>/36816/
>  he had to go with 100km because his team was dead
but this isn't true, if anything it was a stupid move, he just went because he has lizard brain and saw some jobber attacked and noticed everyone else was asleep at the back
and even then multiple teams couldn't get him back




didn't notice that they get Bavarian Erdinger and not local Alsterwasser aka Astra in Hamburg. let's see what winebert comes up for the German harbor city of Hamburg.

















we live in Suisse. thanks to the mandatory UCI trackers I can see if you are watching it or not. you will get DSQd if you don't watch the femmes.







 >>/36842/
he's pogi, UAE has enough money and all the victories are the best ad they can have. but yeah, if I were a sponsor I'd be pissed about the really bad social media presence and amateur level youtube videos literally made by Gianetti himself.







attentionpaying metrics at an all time low. management has decided to schedule a meeting to establish a roadmap to solving this. attendance mandatory of course. berts who are identified as requiring extra support will be scheduled to bertvankoers quiz modules until they reach the minimum target
















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checked PCS for races and saw Fuglsang is in the spitze and how he's retired since today and wanted to post about it but then I searched through the thread and saw that this has been thoroughly discussed so I won't post about it
gotta pay attention


























that Larsen guy seems to be still on the uno-x juice. let's see who's going to pick him up, he has some decent results for a conti shitter.




























 >>/36911/
Same in Polish, my old friendesess - who come from a rather prominent family of Warsaw elite so not bad genes or family capital - when they were young thought these are *actual* heads of small cats and always cowered when they drove across any cobbles.

Anyways, back from another round of kurwathlon, gym, bike to the beach, swim in pisswater and tan (x3), bike home.
Far more bearable today, almost pleasant with the wind.




















 >>/36934/
good luck with that, dehydration kinda got me in the last hour of my ride today. Didn't calculate that all that rain during the night would lead to increased humidity coupled with some heat kek silly me
















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Speaking of the hirtlocker, what happened.
Funny that the only result he's ridden in 3 years was after a self funded training stage in south america. But the peleton is clean ofcourse


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BIG planned for tomorrow, finally after a week, lovely weather predicted
Plan is to ride the biggest climb reachable without going by car. Actually I never rode it before since it requires riding thru the city and I prefer not to do that.










 >>/36960/
> it requires riding thru the city and I prefer not to do that
besides the obvious cagies, is it all the tram tracks to evade or the cats head as learned today that's more annoying?




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I haven't had time today to watch this shitty crit in Zürich. but looks like they had a stream on youtube that I can watch now.
Noemi Rüegg who was supposed to do the Romandie but was DSQd because of the tracker shenannigans participated. Other known names are Mieke Kröger, Mauro Schmid, Silvan Dillier (not pulling the pedalton for Grug for once), Pippo Conca fresh from his disappointing result at Franco-Belge yesterday, Nico Denz (he lives just across the border).
and a surprise visitor from Slovakia (filled his belly with lots of Pierre Baguettes) made it to Switzerland as well, see pic related.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=pzgJrC-z0io















































 >>/37025/
no money in it so everyone any bit good has to shill/maintain a sanitized persona for sponsors, and races are primarily concerned with providing an experience for the amateurs [not necessarily a bad thing, but definitely for the competitive environment].

 >>/37027/
not flat enoUGH but my thoughts exactly.




















BIG NEWS (to me). Slag om Norg is BACK. Some call it the 8th monument after many years of UNFAIR obstructions.
Coming to a screen near you, this August 30th (assuming it's even broadcast anywhere lol)





















what's UAE doing by the way, they were in a good position to light things up
don't tell me they brought this entire team to lead out >molano














































What an absolutely fraudulent peloton lmao. What a disgrace.
It wasn't even an /elite/ front group with tempo specialists it was just a bunch of literal who shitters.











 >>/37116/
> grand tour stage winner nelson oliveira
> wt classic winner rory townsend
> paris-roubaix runner up johan jacobs
what are you talking about it was a quality break


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Is beating Jamie MEEHAN and Patrick CASEY in the oirish NC an insignificant result and not a clear indication that he will repeat this feat in H*mburg? I will let you decide.



 >>/37121/
Had it been Kung, Politt and Asgreen I would have said fair enough those were strong guys but these are all domestiques and conti jobbers that should never be able to hold off a peloton that is actually trying to catch them. Clearly nobody cared enough to give proper chase.







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Anyway, how was your ride, berts?
As for me, I guess as expected. My form could be better but still a-okay. I mostly only "rode" rather than "trained" those past weeks anyway in the monsoom season.
The ride thru city was hell, the chokepoint was even closed and I had to detour thru the literaly city center where 6 million tourists walked about. Millions must die.

Also less than 25 degrees and I already saw people in long sleeves and jackets


























which nation is the arch enemy of Norway? I want to stand with a flag next to the finish in every race that uno-x participates in.






































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Bonkbros, we are so BACK

Despite a 32 degree day and much of the climb being in direct sunlight, I achieved my goal which was keep my heartrate below threshold for basically entire climb. I think my BIG plans for the end of the month are still on track.

As a bonus, I also tested out my new bike mount in prep for next week's trip to the Adirondacks. I also spotted LEGENDARY Austro-American sommelier Aldo SOHM (head somm @ 3* Le Bernadin in NYC and also runs Aldo Sohm Wine Bar) doing laps on the mountain.


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 >>/37211/
I know, I saw his bike frame before I saw his face, and I was like, "That has to be Aldo Sohm". He got some tricked out custom steel bike on a bike tour of Alto Adige last year and the paint is super recognizable.


 >>/37213/
Thing seems sturdy as hell and has great reviews. I have plenty of clearance aside from my building garage which is like 3 meters, so bike needs to be mounted and removed outside.







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Ho, ho, ho, what a DAY of racing we've had! Unexpected victors in races around the globe, but none more stunning than the break kwabbing the sprinters at the ADAC CYCLASSICS HAMBURG race! And another SENSATIONAL .UWT race (2.1 does not apply) means another SENSATIONAL /WORLD TOUR WINE/ !!

We return to Germany for the second and final time of the year. Obviously there is no good wine country in Hamburg, so we are visiting the south of the country for some very interesting wein. While for Eschborn-Frankfurt we enjoyed a Riseling, today we are enjoying a SPATBURGUNDER. Spatburgunder is the German name for Pinot Noir, and Germany is actually the world's third largest producer of PN. Historically, Spatburgunder was a light, alpine wine that was difficult to ripen. As the climate in Germany warms, many people consider German Spatburgunder to the wein of the future, with the light, fruity, moderate character that Burgundy enjoyed for so many years. 

Holger Koch Pinot Noir SF N * (2022)

This is a Pinot Noir from above Baden. I think producer lists it as PN rather than Spatburgunder (which he does for some other cuvees) because it is grown from Burgundian vinestock rather than German vinestock. He also has a hilariously complex classification system for his wines. First, there is quality of the grapes, which includes, Kaiserstuhl, Herrenstuck, *, ***, and Reserve. This is graded one-star. The "SF N" refers to natural, without sulfur. In addition to being unsulfured, this is actually made with 1/3rd carbonic maceration (a technique popularized by Beaujolais) which adds fruity, effusive quality to the wine. Probably used to beef up an otherwise austere wine.

Pours a classic PN pale ruby. Nose is a initially a bit wild with some brett that blows off, then bright red berries, light forest and mushroom, and mint. The nose is perfumed, but very open. The palate is fresh, lively, and fruity. Minimal tannins, fresh acidity.

It is a beautiful wine in that it is so transparent and fresh, but it lacks the depth to be considered great. Very good for the $.

Keep an eye out this week for a special treat from the /WTW/ offices!





 >>/37223/
no quick passing the line to higher speed limits south of Geraardsbergen? ok, let's see, first stage is in the occupied parts of Flanders that are currently under D*tch administration. ah, stage 3, indeed crosses into Wallonia to do the Brique-Potterée climb before doing the same kermisbergs that we already saw during spring. touché. stage 4 runs along the outskirts of Maastricht, but that road belongs to Belgium while also crossing shortly into Wallonie. 
also will there be Italian and French wines for la Vuelta?

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 >>/37226/
> also will there be Italian and French wines for la Vuelta?
We will just have to see. During the Giro, I did have a Slovenian wine when they darted across the border on stage 14 with the crazy day in the rain when Asgreen won. I did not get any Albanian wine for their "grand" depart, but the Vuelta is going right through prime Italian wine country so we will just have to see.


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Just watched the Czech tour finish (while drinking my German wine).

How did that even happen? Cian looked to be moving at 10% speed compared to everyone else all of a sudden. It went from dominant victory to dominant kwab in like 10 seconds





 >>/37230/
it's really not bad, especially not the ones from southern Germany. the one he posted is from the Kaiserstuhl nearby Freiburg a former volcano that makes for a good hill where the southern facing slopes can be used to grow grapes. it's the sunniest and warmest region of Deutschland as well.

 >>/37234/
It is very interesting to drink this as it really does taste like a Dundee Hills PN from Oregon. Both of these regions share volcanic and loess soils and apparently similar climates (a bit cooler than Burgundy, way cooler than anywhere in California).

I have a great love for German Riesling and the occasional Spatburgunder (but I usually drink Burgundy and Oregon and Sonoma Coast PN).


cian still had like 7 seconds with 200 meters to go. he totally blew up. the real remco has the decency to blow up at the start of the climb.


















So there is this news about Eddie DUNBAR going to Q36.5 but I realized I don't care about this runner or about this team so just ignore this post












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 >>/37216/
A little behind last year in terms of overall hours at this point, but much more of my hours this year are running due to the ABYSMAL weather we had all spring. I do not use a trainer so it’s either outdoors or running

 >>/37270/
 >>/37268/
A few years back there were a few really suspicious berts, like the German whose FTP was in the low 400s and 1min max was over 1 kilowatt. Then there was the Slovene climbing bert with over 5w/kg, and then the Canadian who pushed over 500W for 5 minutes.






































 >>/37307/
Oof good work doing that on the flat is something else. But yes indeed there's something really fun about going 25kph uphill. Sadly that was from a few years ago when I was actually training and racing. My 5 min power these days is more like 430w and my weight has gone from 67 to 80 from running and weightlifting so there's that.


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 >>/37309/
Maybe it is a parrot.
Had a bird going off very loud for a few evenings, two years ago. It was surely a birdy call but very loud and nothing like a corvidae or anything from a city bird.
I am sitting once in the dark and a man and a woman come over 20m from me and start calling that bird "come heeere pretty", "come heeere my parrot", "come heeere sweetie". The woman extended her hand to the side to make the bird aim for it as sitting branch.
I don't think the bird came but it did shut the fuck up since then.

Maybe you will find some strikingly similar, morbidly emaciated painters around too.
































not even RAI will broadcast the grande partenza of the Giro di Spagna. Tour de France is like on every second tv channel here, but for the Vuelta you have to hope that Eurosport isn't showing snooker or tennis.







under no circumstances should you pick Mathieu Van Der Poel for the Renewi Tour Velogame. He is a Fraud and is only here to Train. Do Not Pick Him







 >>/37357/
> french tourist traps
M-my dad lives there. That being said it has indeed become 100% touristic place, especially the center. It's nice though, but I hear way too much German in the street



> Environmental activists want the organizers of the 2025 Vuelta a España to scrap the final four kilometers to the summit of Bola del Mundo, according to the leading Spanish newspaper El País. The climb is located in a protected nature reserve, and residents of the Sierra de Guadarrama mountains fear the cycling peloton will cause damage.

Adjust


























 >>/37387/
still plenty of names for the top 10, worse that might top 10 [zonder massive chutes] would be GUYONNET, CARUSO or SHITCOCK. i mean RUBIO and STORER top 10'd the giro this year so it will be better then that at least

 >>/37388/
only if the fish is taken out early. i propose we draw straws and the short straw has to plant EPO in the visma team car.







> Thanks to his university studies in sports science, Schiffer is also active as a (performance) coach. For example, he conducted lactate tests at Bike Aid last winter and prescribed training programs. His current student flat looks like a high-tech laboratory. He also occasionally posts his own data analyses on his Strava profile. Schiffer has completed all available training and data processing courses. According to Bike Aid, he is a unique asset as a rider and data analyst.

Another willing doping subject


My ears are ablaze from hearing the perverted symphonies they call human tongue
My eyes are regressing back into the eye sockets
My mouth, I have no mouth and yet, I must scream
And the stench, the stench being blown here from below, where the foul abominations dwell, below the permanent industrial fog of untold horrors, acursed machinery and decaying cadavers.
Why am I here? Just to suffer?















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