/tulpa/ - Tulpa

Imaginare firendz r real


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Well I've always known I was fundamentally different from most other people but now it's finally got a name. I hate labels but things are as they are, I'm somewhat happy it's not just me. To keep it shorter I participated in a study which ran me through a lot of both physical and mental tests regarding sensory and perception stuff. One test was about sensory processing sensitivity and the examiner increasingly frowned at my answers finally concluding she had rarely ever seen a score like mine. Looks like I'm a textbook example of highly sensitive person, which also makes sense with my INFP reel feel crew MBTI results.

Sensory processing sensitivity (SPS) is defined as greater depth of information processing, increased emotional reactivity and empathy, greater awareness of environmental subtleties, and ease of overstimulation.
The literature on SPS suggests that roughly 20% of the population is
assumed to be highly sensitive and 80% less sensitive (the dreaded normalfags). A popular metaphor is the Orchid-Dandelion metaphor, where Dandelions or weeds reflect the majority of the population (around 80%) who are pretty much dull to the influence of either positive or negative environments, whereas Orchids (the remaining 20%) are strongly affected by environmental adversity but also flourish more in positive environments. At least theoretically.

But most of all, individuals with such traits suffer the negative consequences of environmental adversities more than others. We may thrive and outcompete normies in ideal environments that fit our narrow niche (quiet, beautiful and free of plebs) but simply die in adverse (=average) ones. So it's NOT a good thing to be an Orchid. Orchids aren't keystone species in an ecosystem. Rather an exotic quirk of nature and the first to disappear when things go south. Without much ado. I contrast, Dandelions thrive everywhere. They're resilient die-hards that can cope with a broad environmental spectrum without giving a fuck. Mundane, common, mostly ugly. But successful. 

Literally the sandniggers living in a pile of trash in a devastated war-zone in absolute poverty, but with a smile and 5 children. Those are the weeds. Brutish, dumb and blind to all the ugliness around them. Which makes them not just strong but also easy to satisfy. Maybe they are the true fools. I have always said that the key factor to happiness is - being an idiot. Am I a fool? Probably not. Rather a sad clown.

So yeah this sucks. It means I am primarily an extrinsically motivated person. My motivation is strongly dictated by my environment. I can't function in adverse surroundings even though in a positive environment I am as I always felt intrinsically motivated. I don't need others to tell me what to do. I can come up with everything myself - but only in a good environment. which is an incredibly narrow niche.

So how is this related to tuppering?
Data suggests that high SPS individuals may readily intuit, “feel” and integrate information, and respond to others’ affective states, in particular to positive emotional states of a close partner (relative to a strangers'). These results are consistent with cardinal traits of SPS as they highlight depth of processing, awareness and being more affected by others’ moods. Obviously makes sense. If you are blind to others' emotions you'll run into difficulties emulating another personality and interacting with it.

We're still sorting this out and so far it's not totally clear how much Alice differs from me in this regard. I think less in the sensitivity (you know how picky she is coming up with endless lists of things that are absolutely unacceptable), it's more about the fight/flight/freeze response to such stress. Well you can guess where this goes.




 >>/2388/

I'm sorry Yakumo, but do you know where this is? If you want sympathizers for your afflictions I wouldn't expect it here or on most Tulpamancy Discords. They're a lot like here except with gay flirting thrown in.

It would seem the only people who would comfort you would be among the ones you disparage and would never intentionally communicate with.

If it helps at all, if your "condition" is shared by up to 20% of the population, it's obviously not that debilitating or unusual and likely highly manageable.

I'm glad you figured yourself out, but considering you're in a highly stressful occupation and thriving means even if you're on the spectrum it's a very very mild case that wouldn't require medical intervention for a normal life.

I also wouldn't expect you'd want to be considered part of the "mental illness epidemic".

So, cheer up and relax.

 >>/2388/

One time I was walking with an Armenian friend of mine and she was very white, like from the actual Caucuses mountains an actual Caucasian with blue eyes, no this was when bestie was 3 or so and she was with us too. So this idiot with his dogs were also walking and one is a boxer comes running up to bestie, she's not much taller than the dog and I don't know what the dog's going to do so I forcibly showed it's face the sole of my size 15 and it yipped pretty good. A very satisfying noggin knock. So this Italian looking gym-fag starts up about that but not to me, to my friend. Well she's Armenian so that's not a verbal fight he's going to win. 

So this idiot says, "go back where you came from". Her grandparents escaped the Armenian Genocide and came to the United States what 80 years ago by now, so even her parents were born here. Dude didn't even look that white.

Just a fun story.

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 >>/2389/
That's why we made this place.

> you're in a highly stressful occupation and thriving
What? My job is about as stressful as being a librarian. No customers, no real superiors, zero responsibility. It's a tax-funded protected playground for adults living out their eccentric hobbies. My only worry is that I'll lose this niche sooner or later. And there's no plan B. I could not imagine doing any ordinary job.

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 >>/2390/
I don't even wanna imagine a verbal fight between an Armenian and an Italian. It's exaxtly this shit I can't deal with. Can't people just quietly do their jobs without bothering others? Also he was right, in our world you can only tell people whiter than you to go back to where they came from.

 >>/2397/

> I don't even wanna imagine a verbal fight between an Armenian and an Italian

It was darling, but she didn't need me. He ignored me for some reason but when I finally said, "walking that dog without a leash is illegal" that's when he again ignored me and told her to go back to where she came from. Dude was f-tard and didn't want to even engage me. It's like when the big dog comes up and the two little dogs start fighting. So they don't get eaten. Dude didn't know how close he came to getting his head cracked. Trust me, he wasn't going to come within 100 feet of us again and he didn't.

I could have even started it because he was speaking in a threatening manor to a woman and child and we had witnesses where he didn't. One solid knock would have been enough, but people aren't that stupid around me.


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 >>/2436/
Decent hearing protection. I did flinch a lot when people fired their guns next to me in the begining but now I'm oddly used to it. Also it's at a shooting range. I choose to go there and I can leave whenever I want. Not like I'm exposed to it against my will. Wouldn't want to live next to a range, that would drive me crazy.


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