/tulpa/ - Tulpa

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 >>/1690/
Based.

> 6. This one's for you Yakumo: don't let those lolis give you the puppy eyes.
Should have told me that 30 years ago.

 >>/1691/

I've never been a normie, never. I was a strange child, an awkward young adult and atypical otherwise. Ain't nothing I could do any different. Normies are quitters, they do things logically (self defeating), I do the same thing over and over until I get a different result and it always works eventually. When somethings not working I knock it and it often starts working again.

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/xu7jyb

When someone wrongs you or tries to pick a fight, stay chill, don't even acknowledge the issue, secrecy starts now. If there were witnesses, just shrug it off.

Later, a long time later they won't even remember what happened. Ofc don't let it happen again, but make them think you totally forgot about it, but you didn't.

Now comes the terror, cold calculated retribution. No police involved, no report, no records. You will use your intelligence as a sapient mammal, not teeth or claws like a badger. Time is on your side, it is absolutely necessary that no one knows anything about it. You will study your prey, know their habbits, and their routes. Set the webs like a spider, cast nets like a fisherman, trap like a hunter and this is ultimately important, the most powerful notion, they have to do something wrong to fall into the trap. Something illegal, something immoral, something that they might have gotten away with for years, but this time it's all going to come crashing down. One trap leads to another, the chess board was set by you, the dominos all in a row. 

The best part is, if their clean, if they've repented, no harm will ever come to them. But if they trip, they will fall hard, very hard, you will make sure of that and you will be completely clean and untraceable. The trip will be the blame.

I have beautiful real-life accounts of this, when it happens it's magnificent. They don't have a clue and no one to blame but themselves. True karma isn't magic, it's calculated revenge. There is no such thing as a curse, but you can be the curse.

 >>/1711/
are you a woman?

 >>/1715/

Ah ha! No, but I was raised by demons.

Let's revist mids for a minute, you know, those fatty fish tenders, low demons, handicapable neets, or even narc'd, or twinks? Hey I don't judge you faggot. Now you might be thinking why not? She's not *that bad* I'm no catch myself. Well you're wrong.

You get rejected by a mid? Then what are you? If the girl isn't good enough to immediately show to your friends, "not photogenic", sawdust in the bedroom from all them notches, tatted, pierced, shaved head side, karen, just don't. It's not worth it.

Here's what you do, consider this, you're not blessed with beautiful genes? Then you got two options. One, surgery. Chin implant, nose shaving, etc. Luckily I have a strong chin and nose, my problem was sunken eyes, nothing can fix that, I was told by a doctor that my nose is perfect. I was told my skeletal structure is perfect. So I had to do the second option, get pumped to pump. Suddenly I was the talk of the campus, I polished that turd and my personality still stunk like week old cod, but I became a social butterfly because I became beautiful.

Don't hate me when I steel the girl you were simping over for 7 years, look at you, scrawney or fat, you got stick noodle arms, beer gut, just a dad bod or worse. I got the way I am through intense hard work. And my natural hatred of people in general kept me from the tentacles of dem mids.

So can you, do it. But then put yourself out there bc tinder is for sluts and chads. Join clubs, hiking club, religious bullshit, yid's gonna introduce you to her granddaughter kinda shit. 

I was never in it for the fun, I don't even like people touching me if I don't know them well, but if I ever settle again she's going to be perfect or fuck off.
 - Tats, fuck off, you make bad life choices.
 - Piercings? What are you up to? Drugs or onlyfans? 
 - slutty, dirty, in debt, no way.

Go for the gold man, but you gotta be gold to get gold.

Harsh but probably true.

 >>/1732/

The only objective truth has objective consequences and its harsh as waking up mext tp jabba the hutt. Also, no alcohol = no beer goggles.

The nicest way you can let someone down is to say "you're not my type" but understand she already knows what that means and she's gonna be pissed you called her ugly.

As I got older,my cheeks aren't as puffy, you know, like kids got puffy cheeks, so my eyes don't look sunken anymore. I have large cheekbones so I don't look moonfaced, I just look normal now. But it was prominent when I was 23 and under.

Let's delve even deeper.

What is mid to you?

Let me just say this, she could be homely, that's not mid. She could be thicc, that's not mid, she could have the personality of a potato, that's not mid, it's a combination of things. If she's trad, clean, takes care of herself, that's great. Average looking with all that isn't mid, she doesn't have to be a perfect 10, but she better have other qualities, that's all I'm saying.

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 >>/1737/
dont you stay away from relationships?

 >>/1739/

I'm just helping out my brother bears. Naa I was shattered in my last relationship, the next one will kill me. My system's #1 objective is to keep me away from relationships. I'm past that in my life now. Literally people, multiple people in my life would have to die first.

Ofc my #2 objective is scenario #13. It's not life and death though.

I don't have a kid, you know, but I sorta do. First of all, I'm a godfather to besty, her real father died of cancer when she was 3, sounds familiar, so if her mother, who I knew long before she was even married, died, and I don't know if the paperwork is set or not or what is even needed, but at least her mother wants me to be her legal guardian, and in addition, I have a no-resuscitate order for her mother. Anyway, her mother, my friend for a long time, since undergrad, actually listens to my advice about her sometimes.

Anyway here's what I came to say. Girl likes to play games, she's got an xbox (I bought it for her during lockdown), switches (2, guess who bought that), an ipad with every game you can imagine (wouldn't buy apple anything to save her life, no thanks) and as long as she does well in school, I mean who doesn't do well in 3rd grade? 4th grade? I forgot. Then she gets nearly unlimited access to these games. She also watches youtube kids a lot. She gets plenty of exercise, she's not overweight, she's actually strong as heck and she can keep me down when rowing bjj (she's a higher belt).

Anyway, I'm over there a few times a week and her mother helps me with my business and thank Ganesha for that, so I play with besty a bit, I always loved playing with kids, babies to any age really, and so my contention is she should continue to have unlimited screen time within reason, not 1/2 hour or some bullshit like some of her "friends". 

Her mother often gets on a kick where she wants to limit it and besty goes nuts understandably. Well I successfully argue for letting her have them, she doesn't play online games, no social media, no roblox, amongus, mmo, nothing like that, I am 100% on board with that restriction, no tictoxic, no twatter, no rumble (because it's a secret that I'm leading her to a moderate way of thinking, not conservative or liberal like her mother) and rumble is undeniably conservative. 

Anyway, go on and tell me that it's bad to let her have that much screentime, here's my take, the doctors recommend 1/2-1 hours a day max, so now look at the percentage of kids 83% SELF REPORTED, to have used drugs in the last month from 8th grade through high school. A quarter of them, hard core drugs, cocaine, heroine. Half of them, binge drinking.

Looks like kids need something of an escape, gaming always was enough for me. I don't care of she doesn't have many other friends if 83% of those losers are going to be strung up, half will be crunk, 2% will be incarcerated, 1 in 7 will run away (human trafficked, on skid row tricking for drug money) so no, fuck you and your doctor because this system is broken, fuck those other kids because they're losers, half will end up in poverty, she can have gaming.

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1/2
Are we a self-help group for parents now?
Anyway, I'm reeally glad I don't have to deal with kids in the modern world. And I'm even more glad I'm not a kid anymore. Honestly, if you're living in a somewhat urban modern western environment, kids are fucked anyway. You either give in to the social media mayhem with +20hr screen time per day or become an outcast loser detached from society (like me). So I get your point, it's just not realistic to keep kids away from the screen because the modern world pretty much is on that screen. If she's not on social media or plays online games she's already a weirdo.

I've seen many parents trying to shield their kids from the madness of the world - which is understandable but inevitably sooner or later leads to disaster.

Paracelsus famously said "Sola dosis facit venenum" and he's right. You need to know about the poison and in low doses it may even have positive effects. In the end it's all about the dose whether something is good or bad. That also goes for drugs even if we both don't like it.

Bottom line - the essential skill for succeeding in life is self-control. Knowing when to stop. If you know when to stop you can get away with ridiculously stupid shit. If you don't, well, you'll get the Darwin Award. Natural selection. But it's still better than taking my path of staying away from everything and playing Buddha sitting under a tree for 200 years. I can't recommend it. Moderation is the key.

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2/2
And if you think you're the only one who can brag with IRL loli stories you're mistaken.

> be me

> be in Germany

> neighbor single mom be like 'hold my loli while I go shopping'

> mfw


So basically this woman I also know for about 20 years increasingly loads off her 7 year old slightly dimwit daughter to me. Well she asked me multiple times if I wasn't bothered by her because that girl doesn't understand the concept of personal space or privacy and just home invades me on a whim now. Over the fence if necessary. You know, give them an inch and they'll take a mile. So yeah, at least as long as no other kids are available, said loli has become a bit overly fond of me. Which is less fun than it sounds for several reasons. 

Now to the main point, things got very awkward yesterday. Parents and Bears see kids as angelic beings and kids know how to behave in the presence of adults. But when the cat's away, the mice will play. I've seen it with my former loli gang as well. Clearly I do not fall into the category of 'adult' for those girls which should be slightly alarming in itself.

I already said she’s really nice to me but a bitch with other girls. And as soon as mom was gone her personality shifted and she realized she can say whatever she wants now and ‘shit’, ‘fuck’ and ‘pussy’ became increasingly frequent in her vocabulary. Not in a hostile way at all, she just clearly enjoyed trying out increasingly bad and forbidden words while telling me some mundane stuff mixed with utter nonsense. Kids love to test the boundaries of what’s acceptable. And especially girls like to manipulate others with words. But that was just the beginning.

Keep in mind, girl is barely 7 and I don’t know her that well. We’re just distant neighbors.
While sweeping my garden with a big wooden broom she pretended to be a witch riding the broom. Suddenly stops and grins at me. ‘Imagine getting this wooden stick into your pussy! Do you think this fits into my pussy?’ *points at loli pussy*
What the actual fuck? I’m not making this shit up.
Alice decided it was about time to get this conversation on track again and tell her that’s not an acceptable thing to ask but I was saved by my cat which drew her attention away. Things remained relatively civil until her mom picked her up a bit later but still there’s definitely something odd about that girl. Even for German standards. I mean she often runs around butt-naked (yes, even into my house now) and would probably follow any stranger that walks by. And her mom is both overprotective and utterly naive. Well at least there’s also a dad somewhere and grandparents so I’m not in any danger of inheriting that loli. Still gotta keep more distance from those people. They’re nuts. So far every single female that was fond of me turned out nuts, regardless of age. No exception.

This is why I have no-nonsense loli tupper who is 100% sane and reliable. Kids are monsters. And if you ain’t a monster tamer they will eat you alive.

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 >>/1831/

First of all, that sounds like a huge liability and if I can berate Alice for a moment, Alice, wyf you allow this eventual long prison sentence? Stop this shit immediately .

Secondly, if bestie even says damn or kill, she gets corrected, don't be aggressive, be dominant. Next, have ammunition, if threats of telling her mother does nothing then there has to be something else that she wants or doesn't want taken away. Third, a quick opem hand slap on the cheek with next to zero force goes a long way, it tells them that bombers can easily grace their skies overhead and nuclear armageddon is always an option. A warning shot across the bow does wonders for a mutinous crew. I've had to do this twice and let me just say she understands what's appropriate. The first time she was talking with a sass mouth, that's not acceptable. The last time she was getting in the habbit of saying and doing the opposite and repeating what everyone says on top of that. Nope, that ain't happening on my watch.

She told her mother both times, the first time I got a lecture and "It's never appropriate to hit" speach to both of us, the second time her mother agreed with me bc she was sick of that behavior as well.

I can also relate to the witch scene though bestie didn't do that bc she can't swear, but she started rubbing on herself more than once while watching science videos. Don't ask me why but girl got stopped real quick, that's not appropriate behavior in public. My ex's little sister did something like that at 15 on the floor in front of me and I said, "what are you doing?" She said "nothing" but was very embarrassed.  I don't know what she was thinking or expected but she didn't expect a stern voice from me, and she should have known better by then but she tried to half flirt with me a few times, she's all growed up now and has since moved on with healthy relationships. 

This isn't the first time I could potentially and horrifyingly "inherit" a loli bc my sister was a loser, she had a girl when I was still a kid myself and left to go live the drug life, leaving her 3 yr old daughter with my mother. I moved out soon after but then her father also lost custody due to drug reasons and didn't want her anyway so she was permanently with my mother. It was unfortunate, but it was undersood that because I spent time with her during her formative years, after her mother died if my mother had died, she was to come live with me since I had a stable job and homelife. She's since all growed up too. Honestly I like kids but playing with one and taking care of one is the difference between Earth and Mars for habitability.

If I inherited a loli, the home business ends and I cash out of that, probably move to Montana. I can't imagine the stress of her being a latchkey kid in 2023 like I was before, ain't happening. 

Let's never speak of this again. I am done talking about lolis. I'll stab my inner ear if I have another loli dream, hear that brain?

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 >>/1834/
> Let's never speak of this again. I am done talking about lolis.

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 >>/1840/

I need a loli break. Seriously. Just burned out by it all. I'm going to move on. 

I'm dead blah

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 >>/1834/
> Sound Bear Advice for Life
> Hit lolis in face

 >>/1872/

> Open hand slap with zero force

https://youtu.be/RlJV33ZsXAs?feature=shared

A special message to someone special:

Don't be led around by your loli tentacles around lolis.

Bestie slapped me.

I was at her house to take care of some business as usual and she was just getting ready for bed. I can't remember what I said to her, something like, "It's time for bed," and she got angry and slapped me. Oh yeah, she accused me of pulling her hair. I was helping to dry her hair, I sometimes dry her hair while her mother takes care of other things for me and she was saying we should play xbox or something. It doesn't matter, but what matters is when she slapped me and it wasn't zero force, I laughed. 

She slapped me again, harder, and I said, "that's enough, go."

She said, "you need to follow directions!" 

I said, "no, I'm the adult." And tried to headbutt me.

She then ran and told her mother that I pulled her hair. Her mother said, "what were you doing that he pulled your hair?" she feigned innocence and yes her hair got pulled but it was because I was drying it and she tried to headbutt me but only succeeded in getting her hair pulled, it seriously wasn't my intent.

Her mother saw right through it and said to her, "will you promise never to do that again?" she didn't speak as she faked her sulking. Then she turned to me and said, "will you promise never to do that again?" and I immediately said, "Promise to never dry her hair again? Because that's what I was doing, so no." 

I never had a little sister, but this is exactly the kind of things little sisters do. 

Look, her bedtime is around the same time as mine and I was tired, I'm a workaholic, not a playmate for hire, not her toy, not her servant, I'm her friend yes, but you can't force friends to do what you want, believe me on that one, it's not what friends do.

Before I left she felt bad and hugged me, I told her she was a good girl for doing all her homework and she liked that. 

Gawd, I am sooooo glad I'm not a father, what a fucking drama fest.

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So much for being done with lolis

 >>/1933/
> Gawd, I am sooooo glad I'm not a father, what a fucking drama fest.
This.
I seriously can't deal with children. They're literally insane which scares the shit out of me. I need reliable, emotionally stable and drama-free people around me, not psychos. Also especially girls can be unbelievably mean and selfish. Well it's not their fault, it's society's fault. When I was around ten, no kid would have slapped an adult or ordered him around. It was simply unimaginable.

> I'm not a playmate for hire, not her toy, not her servant, I'm her friend yes, but you can't force friends to do what you want, believe me on that one, it's not what friends do.
Uh, I hate to say this but you can't be friends with little girls. This is what I wanted for my entire life but it doesn't work. It's already extremely hard to be friends with women for the same reason, but girls? In the end you'll always be exactly this hired playmate / toy / servant / walking gift dispenser that is only loved as long as it is deemed useful. Don’t we all hate broken dispensers that don’t spit out what they’re supposed to at the push of a button? Stupid machine!

I still wonder what I was for my loli gang. Convenient for sure. But a true friend? They weren't even true friends with each other. Girls aren't friends with each other. They're rivals, not comrades.

 >>/1940/

> I need reliable, emotionally stable and drama-free people around me, not psychos.

*whistles nonchalantly*

> Uh, I hate to say this but you can't be friends with little girls. 

No comment, I don't argue with obviously wrong nor evident statements.

Sometimes I feel like going onto social media and telling it straight. I'd probably be banned, doxxed and canceled immediately. I'd love to read all the hate from those little busy ants when I encroach on their little ideological nest.

Like:

I'm not an incel, I just wouldn't want to date someone who'd so easily give it up to me. 

Where are the good girls hiding? Why is everyone a hoe with OF and Tinder nowadays?

I want a tradwife.

...

Honestly I think I'm pretty much done with all this though, I seriously loath to get in with anyone anymore. It's all so boring and drama filled, fake, and eww. I'd rather buy a farm and live miles from anyone in any direction.

So I often look into self help books and this is one I perused lately. My conclusion:

Though all the points (made 85 years ago) are still valid and helpful, some are a little situational. 

1. Letting someone else talk- no some people are mongoloid and nothing salvageable can be gleaned from their verbal diarrhea.

2. Telling someone they have a talent in order to help them improve is a straight up lie sometimes and often the brutal truth will help them more. Instead of telling someone who is obviously a bad dancer "You have raw talent and just need practice to be great" you could say, "I like your passion and energy, and with a lot of hard work you could improve especially if you can find the style of dance that fits you best." In other words, sorry to break this to you chief but you dance like a rotten potato on heals, but there's a thousand styles of dance so try some of them out, you could get lucky.

I found myself saying this to someone who was so bad at art I honestly knew 5-yr olds who drew better without practice, including me. I told them, "you've been practicing this style for a while and you're still struggling, you just need to find a style of art that matches your natural talent." In other words, you suck at this dude, stop wasting your time and try something else. Wow, what a sociopath I am.

3. It feels like most people around me are using most of these techniques most of the time and I clearly do without ever having read this book before. So conversations seem a little fake and disingenuous because I can see through these techniques and my ego is bulletproof by now. The honest truth is, "what do you want from me, what do I want from you, and how can we come to an agreement that maximumly benefits me without offending you."

4. Here's one they touch on but I use a lot: give someone direction in the conversation while secretly guiding them to make the statement or conclusion you want them to make so that to them it will feel like their idea. I had a boss who would snub every one of my ideas--this place was toxic. I learned that my boss would accept answers from this other guy without question. One day I told this guy an idea of mine that the boss has already snubbed and asked him to mention it as if it was his own idea. He did and the boss loved it. He didn't even listen to me obviously. So later he came to me with a stupid idea and through a combination of compliments and redirecting him, I made him make a conclusion that was actually useable. How? "I heard you mention this previously and I thought it was a great idea..." or "Hey, you're a smart guy, so I'm sure you thought about this..." or "I know you already know this but can you help me understand..." or "you need to share some of your great ideas [interject misinterpreted retarded words he actually used but in such a way that they actually make sense]. The guy was puddy in my hands after that. Still hated him, still got out of there. 

Anyway, yall are like puppies, not at all what I expected from chan-life, practical, intelligent, even anon is cool, so none of this crap is even necessary. You're awake. Man I've known some heavy sleepers.

Anyway thanks for being you, now follow my advice and don't fuck it all up ffs you racist lolicon mongoloid bastards. (Not you Tamamuwu, you seem normal, Ashley finds your posts darling and the Cat pics are above and beyond.) Man, how did Alice let a normie in here?

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 >>/1943/
It's a matter of semantics. In this Dark Age of social media, everyone you've ever communicated with is considered a 'friend'.

I've adopted a strict definition and there are only 3 guys outside my family I'd call my friends. I've known them for over 30 years and I know I can rely on them when SHTF. The imagistic paleolithic hunting party that moves as if it were a single organism. Other people are not my friends. They're acquaintances, colleagues, whatever. But for exactly the reason you stated, they're not my friends. Friends care for each other and a friendship is also a commitment.

Children make friends quickly but  how much does that really mean? Also you're already deep in surrogate father territory and parents can't be friends with their children as long as they're underage. That's not how it works and a recipe for disaster. Friends should be equal.

Now don't get me wrong, I wish you a beautiful friendship with your Bestie from the bottom of my heart, as I said that's what I always wanted. But I don't see how it could work out. You said yourself you expect to be discarded sooner or later.

 >>/1945/
> I'd rather buy a farm and live miles from anyone in any direction.
Yes absolutely. At least you have the chance, there's no such thing in Germany or anywhere else in Middle Europe.

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I can't interact with irl people as tupper so my standards are a bit different but still very strict. And yes, you're my friends, the only ones I got, the only ones I need. Thanks for being here, we make a great team!

 >>/1953/
I don't wanna 'win friends' or manipulate people. I hate that. We're Germans and as such very direct. Even someone as timid as host has learned to state the brutal truth with my guidance. Probably ruined his career but it was worth it. Say no to diplomatic nothingspeak, tell people to their faces they're a waste of organic matter.

 >>/1962/
lmao /tulpa/ in a nutshell

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 >>/1953/
> Tamamuwu, you seem normal, Ashley finds your posts darling and the Cat pics are above and beyond. Man, how did Alice let a normie in here?
I'm the only normal person here!
HELP ME!!

 >>/1975/

Signs you may not be a tulpamancer:

1. You honestly don't have any mental deficiencies or Degenerate leanings. (Same thing)

2. You don't have a desire to be a Discord moderator.

3. Not Aspie

4. Don't like communism or the Marxist ideology.

5. Actually have a job.

6. Don't live with your parents.

7. Aren't on anti-depressants 

8. Can have a natural conversation without using the words placebo or confabulation.

9. Not a furry fag

10. Have no interest in pokemon

 >>/1976/

Danget I didn't write degenerate I wrote LLLLGGGGGBBBBTTTTTQQQQTTTT+++IAOFU

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 >>/1977/
I love the wordfilter so much it's unreal

 >>/1975/
deep down he's probably the biggest pervert
ohwait no thats bear

 >>/1979/
> degenerate
lol

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 >>/1989/
> ohwait no thats bear