/bert/ - ciclismo

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new s-works model dropped with a peculiar design dropped: the front wheel cassette.

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NIBALI looking sharp

nibbles looks old, which means I am old

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 >>/54857/

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Did you know that Hagia Sofia is actually not in Sofia but rather in Constantinopole?

holy jew, look at the schnoz on that lady

> tfw no hag sofia cyc gf

You're in Bulgaria... webm
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riders reaction before the start of the 2026 Giro

jesus christ get to the stages already

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Why are the grandes filibustering their own route presentation?

 >>/54857/
kek

 >>/54857/
grok is this real?

now with even more infinite amore

> giro south of milano
is this real life?

BLOCKHAUS
L
O
C
K
H
A
U
S

they are trying to reach Napoli again from the south, what could possibly go wrong? also blockhaus hype

> 246 km up block house
hello, based?

PAPER

> 40 km flat ITT
Memco booking tickets to Kishinev, Bulgaria, as we speak

good lord that stage 14

giro is putting the grand back into the grand tour

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why is nibbles dressed like for a funeral? and the white sneakers with a suit meme needs to end.

good route for now, nice and evenly spaced so I expect some actual fight

translator jumpscare

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 >>/54857/

ok, I have to put May 26th into my calendar. it's good that it's in central ticino pretty quickly reachable by trein.

ok and the 4th week?

translator can't translate sheik into english

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holy bonk stage
nice long descent to freeze to death

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 >>/54894/
crazy shit

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memco should probably do this one, that TT can compensate the minutes of time loss in the few really hard stages
it's a pretty open route

Vingo v Remco v Del Dopo v Cararat at the Giro

 >>/54897/
no vingo please, he'll smother the race with boredom like the vuelta last year
memco vs elite vs del dopo vs sexass vs ayuso

 >>/54894/
this will get cancelled due to weathet anyway

 >>/54898/
I already forgot about ayuso's existence 2bqh

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 >>/54900/
pls bert remember me

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 >>/54901/
no

 >>/54903/
HELL YEAH what are you wrenching?

 >>/54903/
again?

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 >>/54903/
it's all so tiresome

 >>/54904/
My left crankarm just fell off

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mechanical failure, the top part of the "screw" separated from the body

 >>/54908/
what the hell, did that plastic screw sheer off?

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 >>/54909/

 >>/54910/
I would say what the fuck if I hadn't replaced this thing twice because the threads were fucked
but still what the fuck

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 >>/54910/
damn well at least it happened indoors, wouldn't have happened if shimano used a non-proprietary metal screw for preload but who are we to critique them 
a reminder for all of us to check the torque of our screws from time to time, with our strength its only a matter of time until something comes loose and breaks

Damn I missed the giro pres, how was the momy game this year?

The litte thing (4) that's supposed to prevent the thing from going off either didnt help or it's broken too, i cant really tell

 >>/54910/
 >>/54915/
Time to buy a new bike, obviously

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 >>/54914/
I reckon that bitch ass (4) thing can't do much if the two screws that clamp the crankarm down are too loose, the crank arm probably moves too much under load and the plastic screw can't withstand that as we can see

 >>/54915/
how loose were your bolts, that thing is like a shitty last minute safety measure

 >>/54917/
 >>/54918/
Yeah the bolts were probably too loose or something, that's my cope at least

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 >>/54908/
This is not a "screw" to fasten stuff, this is a "screw" just to apply some pre tension.
That's why the proper "tool" for this "screw" is made out of plastic and the only torque on it is applied from the palm of your hand.
FFS Bert!

 >>/54910/
Wait, this failure mode is even worse:
Did you remove the crank arm without removing the tensioning "screw" first?
WFT Bert!

 >>/54914/
Bert... this little thing (4) is not preventing anything, it is just an indicator so you know if the crank arm is "deep enough" on the axle.
Well, Bert... have you read any manual before hand?

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 >>/54920/
The front fell off

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 >>/54910/
why does shit like this keep happening to you?

 >>/54920/
to be fair that small pin on 4 is supposed to to hold your crank as a last ditch effort when the bolts are completely loose 
I'm more surprised bertman never felt his left crank was so damn loose it came to this
I mean you can even visually see it when the bolts aren't tight enough because the gap gets so big

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 >>/54921/
> thing fell off again award

 >>/54923/
But how did the crank become loose in the first place?

 >>/54922/
I fall so you can walk
 >>/54923/
Maybe that's why, the pin worked so well so i didn't realize something was awry until it finally gave up and it went off like butter
 >>/54924/
Clearly the bolts were too loose

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 >>/54924/
Bolts not torqued, crank gets wiggle room.
2.5 meter bert hulking on his rape machine getting that crank to hit the cheap piece of plastic at 100 rpm for god knows how long.
Piece of plastic holding on for dear life, the pin is cracked so he continued even after that.
To be fair to the shimano dudes, I'm pretty sure that piece of plastic that came off on the preload bolt is supposed to come off because otherwise the entire plastic threads would've just sheared off on the inside ruining even more.

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 >>/54925/
> Clearly the bolts were too loose
In your defense, you can blame/claim it on your massive WATT gainz!

 >>/54926/
> To be fair to the shimano dudes, I'm pretty sure that piece of plastic that came off on the preload bolt is supposed to come off because otherwise the entire plastic threads would've just sheared off on the inside ruining even more.
Indeed, it's a kinda forgiving and slow failure mode with rather cheap replacement parts.

 >>/54925/
didn't it feel loose, last time I forgot to torque them it felt like my foot plate was loose when I pulled up
only to realize that it was the crank that was wiggling

 >>/54929/
Only for 30 seconds before it came off
It felt exactly like a loose cleat would

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Let us all internalize the following: If your cleats feel loose stop pedaling immediately and search for the cause

that is CLEARLY (6) and not (4)

 >>/54932/
(6) is a bsa bb cup
(1) is the plastic preload bolt that got rekt
(4) is a safety pin

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 >>/54931/
don't want to imagine what would have happened outside
let us all make a small checklist of critical bolts we check every month or two

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 >>/54932/
In fact I'm already checking them right now because of this horrible ordeal

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Found an e-shop in steinschönau that has the very last two screws for my R8000 Ultegra in böhmen.
I am not certain the R8100 ones are compatible as they are half the length. They probably are but even AI overlord is not sure (part Y1P417000 vs Y1KS13000)

 >>/54930/
Maybe "unsymmetrical" tightening of the two bolts?
I mean, frequent shifting between tightening both bolts to the final 12-14Nm.
Or maybe the switch from riding outside in ciclismo weather to winter hell?
Frame carbon, bb shell aluminium, spindle steel, crank arm aluminium, crank arm bolts steel, tension cap plastic...
Things just get some play with this mix of materials.

 >>/54936/
I'm pretty sure the shimano crank screws are interchangeable

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Inspect and clean your bottom parts regularly Berts.

 >>/54910/
Gesu Christu, Deus meu, Espiritu Santu.
 >>/54912/
I was putting that off, buying a torque wrench, but it is time. Brtek saves lives, perhaps.

Package will arrive next monday
I guess r*nning is back on the menu
Or I can pedal only with the right pedal!

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 >>/54941/
OR I could blaspheme, put it back on and just tighten everything properly
Technically that would still work

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 >>/54934/
I check any and all things that you can torque down on a bike every couple months and there's always at least 1 or 2 bolts somewhere that are like 0.5 - 2 Nm off. Never really loose but sometimes enough that it's actually concerning and gives me paranoia where I check it after each ride for 3 or 4 days 
Of course I also went to check it all now but this time everything's tight

 >>/54943/
Asking for friend, but torque wrench recommendation?

I haven't touched a single bolt on my 10 year old defy. He has like 40k km on it (I don't think he has been rained on THOUGH)

 >>/54944/
Your slovakian friend doesn't have a torque wrench? Bertacek....

I obviously don't own a torque wrench either

 >>/54945/
Never cmoved your saddle? I find that hard to believe

 >>/54948/
Ah true I actually tried at least 3 saddles on it.

 >>/54944/
I have two very expensive ones that I appropriated from work so I can't recommend anything specific unless you want to pay BIGLY but I would say any small wrench that has a range of 2-40 Nm would be good. See that it comes with a set of hex bits H2-H10 and torx bits T10-T25 or T30 if possible since torx is getting increasingly more common on bike parts.
I don't think spending a lot of money is necessary because surely anything that's sold in an online bike shop is calibrated and accurate enough

 >>/54946/
He did have one and see what just transpired
 >>/54950/
Alright then

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 >>/54945/
if you ever do touch anything it will all fall apart that's how it goes with mechanical things that work for ages without maintenance

 >>/54952/
My opinion as well

great, now I am looking for cyber monday bike tool deals to consoome

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 >>/54944/
I have this one, BBB cycling
not that expensive IIRC
goes up to 14 Nm
what do you need higher for except the cassette anyway, that's full crank

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 >>/54955/
off the top of my head
> cranksets that don't have pinch bolts but only one big bolt that you tighten with 35 or 45 nm 
> disc lock rings 
arguably the lock ring you can do by feel aka as hard as you can but the crankset one is more delicate, too little torque and the crankarms can come loose while too much may crush the bearings or preload adjuster if it has one

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 >>/54956/
never done the disc lock ring to torque, I got a wrench for that so I never really cared
just make it tight, ain't coming off anyway
the crankset without pinch bolts I do not own

> Wout van Aert may be making different choices in his approach to the spring classics. The Italian WorldTour classics Strade Bianche and Milan-San Remo could be back on his schedule.

kinda sad he has to beg his dutch masters to do these races considering it's probably the 2 biggest ones on his palmares

 >>/54958/
last year was so retarded. Everybody knew they made a mistake with his program in 2023 but because he crashed they preferred to repeat the mistake instead of admitting fault

> not having an hundred dollarydoo wrench
ISHYBDDT
https://www.parktool.com/en-us/product/ratcheting-click-type-torque-wrench-tw-5-2

 >>/54959/
> For Heijboer, everything is open for discussion. "All options are open again. Whether it's a traditional preparation or something with extra height planned for another time. We haven't made a decision on that yet, but the most important thing is: we need a long period where Wout can train continuously and build up. These periods cannot be interrupted."

they'll do it again, they'll win nothing again
grug will golf between winning MSR and winning E3 and winning Roubaix again

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 >>/54961/
Grug will ride tirreno, 4 one day races and then straight to XC

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 >>/54962/
These periods cannot be interrupted

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 >>/54963/
If it's the price to pay to see him kwab wout on roubaix for 4 more years I'll accept it

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 >>/54960/
> only $100
> Calibrated to be accurate to +/- 4%
pfffff

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 >>/54955/

Do any of you follow Jonas "third puberty" Abrahamsen in his off season training
that guy is insane but very interesting since he's pretty open about what he does

 >>/54967/
He's giving his protocol?

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 >>/54968/
he's just jumping on tables in his gardening shed for strength training and doing long vinester rides on zwift

 >>/54967/
I look up captain america from time to time but I think atm pros dont do much interesting training, just z2 or fatmax

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he's a Z3 lord

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 >>/54971/
LT1 (AKA FATMAX) is a pretty good pace to ride endurance at although depending on your fitness your LT1 is at upper z2 rather than z3 like it is for pro athletes 
many a pro including pog have stated that upper z2 to lt1 intensity is their favorite intensity to ride at

 >>/54972/
even our legendary finnbert does LT1

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captain america lives at like 2200m but doesn't even have to freeze yet whats up with that tsk

 >>/54972/
Odd zone appreciators stay winning (and grinning) bigly

how low down on you're quads are bib shorts supposed to fit, right above the knee or more in the dygert direction ?

god dammit it's no easy task to find out the correct torque wrench set, there's like 6 million different types

 >>/54977/
they don't have harbour freight in good old czech'em eh

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 >>/54978/
It's not in EU at all

However, this sounds reasonable. $30, max 14 nM and brand name sounds like Topkek.

 >>/54979/
I p*rchased some stuff from Topkek before as well

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let me guess...you need more?

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hi Berts I've been on vacation but here's my duvet tonight

 >>/54982/
luv quads
luv cherries
luv duvels
luv vacations
simple as

watched some nerd playing eu(5) livestream while doing me raping
holly fuck you guys don't seriously play that right? nearly fell asleep and chute comicaled in the bojler room after he spent the first half hour on pause tweaking the cabinet settings and tax policy of england

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 >>/54976/
depends on your thighs and/or tummy

This wout roubaix recon was actually an ad for these new recording glasses. Makes sens now

 >>/54982/
I've been there once

 >>/54987/
Gotta say the footage is very buttclenching

 >>/54989/
It's great footage, I think these glasses will be quite popular with wannabe influencers

 >>/54990/
I will stream my egg hunts on the bert24/7 channel

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The hype is ON wout bros

Putting Autismbert's life savings on W*ut winning the RVV

 >>/54976/
If you're not a leglet it should be as high as possible

 >>/54991/
I wonder if the riders will be allowed to use it inrace. Imagine the live footage of pogi kwabbing vigo

 >>/54995/
Through velon they already do stuff like this so it might happen

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Hello, Bert!

Streaming Taxi (1998) on this Saturday (Dec 6th).
At 9:00 and 21:00 CET - that is 8:00 and 20:00 UTC. Do you guys have American posters, or they are just VPNs whatevers? Anyway for them it's 3am and 3pm EST.
https://cytu.be/r/endcorner

Also BO should log in.

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 >>/54997/
We have a couple of real red blooded Americans in our midst, trucks and guns and freedom and all 
yeehaw

Mug Blooded American... mp4
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 >>/54998/
Yuo mean MUG blooded?

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 >>/54999/
some of them are heavy drinkers unironically

 >>/54997/
I really like this film, very nostalgic.
Anyhow, my Mondince gr*vel bike arrived and shall be assembled soon.

 >>/54996/
It's a money problem, as always

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Paypig report:
> 2 new tires
> 2 new chains (discounted)
> new šamoá
> new topkek torque wrench

 >>/55003/
Fuck I need new chain + cassete on me MTB, forgot when I did the winter paypigeri yesterday

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 >>/54993/
I actually have life savings now so this is NOT a good idea

 >>/55001/
VERY good I may also get that one because my gravel frame is too short as well and I'm really noticing it now that I ride it on the road a lot

 >>/55005/
Technically even 1 (one) euro could be one's life savings

 >>/55000/
Nice digits.

 >>/55001/
If you have the time, stop by then.

phwoar strong headache today
surely not a hangover because yesterday evening's drinking session was light and playful

 >>/54997/
Now that's classic straight from the beautiful hood of Marseille!

 >>/55003/
have you sold all the tubes with short stem from you're collection in the attic yet to recoup some cash?

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 >>/55003/
> torture wrench

 >>/55011/
I still have them and used them on my gravel rims with brand new gravel tires that I used exactly once because I forgot the old rims were actually a bit elipsoid

 >>/55007/
Who says I had one eurodollar. /cyc/ office paid really badly

please don't claim /bert/. haven't had any spam lately, so I didn't had to login lately.

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 >>/55015/

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39 years old Naveen JOHN is your Ind*an ITT campeon of 2025

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Some BIG names with disappointing results at the ladies race

 >>/55018/
K Dnf

 >>/55019/
That's what I say when I am DONE. K, DNF

 >>/55018/
pcsAI malfunctioning

 >>/55017/
I have seen this guy IRL believe it or not
that club team he rides for is a few streets away

 >>/55022/
the only top pros I seen was in blessed Durango

new UCI dopage statement dropped:
> The Union Cycliste Internationale (UCI) announces that Italian rider Martti Sciortino has been sanctioned with an 18-month period of ineligibility following an Anti-Doping Rule Violation for the presence of Dehydrochlormethyltestosterone metabolite (DHCMT) as well as Stanozolol metabolites (Stanozolol)* in a sample collected during the BMX Swiss Challenge Cup on 24 May 2025.

 >>/55024/
doping in bmx is sad

> beer time zonder burger
very grim
and there's more to come too

 >>/55026/
👋🏼👋🏼👋🏼 gains 
say hello to your replacement, minor but persistent cold

 >>/55026/
why zonder ?

 >>/55026/
> inb4 sick
> again

 >>/55026/
normal crankless behavior

> wait for your rivals to hit the booze
> score sprint intervals on they're day off
> surpass and kwab them with minimal efforts
it's just that shrimple
take notes j*nas

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We're back, sadly

 >>/55032/
good warmup

 >>/55033/
My ass sadly detrained too fast. 2 weeks without r*ping and he was ready to bleed after 1h of z2

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 >>/55034/
it's over

https://youtube.com/watch?v=xzsyJhXYEyo
I'm watching r*pe racing with BIG watts as I r*pe zonder race with small watts what a time to be alive

 >>/55036/
fucking hell that dude was slamming it just now

 >>/55036/
No way this dude is 70kg, is he the smallest Norge alive?

 >>/55038/
I think he said he's 173 cm earlier

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 >>/55039/
he's just like me

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Here it is, test ride tomorrow

 >>/55041/
I recognize that saddle

 >>/55041/
Can the seatstay be even lower?

 >>/55043/
It's provocative, it gets the people going.

 >>/55041/
👍🏼

 >>/55041/
It's just black.

 >>/55036/
this race was brutale

going on a date with my cyc gf tonite

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no burger, only rumpsteak
beer was okay
my voice sounds like i am about to die
gains leaving me body

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> rump meat

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Speaking of unprobable brand, there is a french brand making frames in Italy and selling them for a fortune. I wonder how this thing survives

 >>/55051/
Stuff like this never makes sense to me. They have to live off one sale a month or something

 >>/55052/
It's probably some rich kid pet project

 >>/55051/
It looks like an open mould Chinese bike, wtf

 >>/55054/
Handmade in Italy they say, no idea if it's true

 >>/55055/
they wouldn't lie would they

 >>/55055/
Hand assembled maybe

wish I could come up with decent ideas for a fake brand to scam investors with ..

 >>/55036/
Pretty strong upper body on the dude. If Norway wasn't notoriously CLEAN I would have a few suspicions

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What if dead internet theory is true and everything is just AIs talking to each other. They could be on cycling forums and even start new ones. They can even think they are real. What if I am an AI too

 >>/55062/
how did he get away with it?

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 >>/55063/
the general audience clapped that's how

 >>/55063/
by being clean and innocent of these slanders of coursh

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randomly assorted news from the world of ciclismo:
> Pimmel Pornhaar joining team back pain, which he blames for his bad results recently.
< EF femmes rider Veronica Ewers to take a break as she didn't have a period since 2014
> Patje had to eat Belgian hospital food during 3 weeks
< Oscar Onley in Australia with his /cyc/ gf feeding Yaks and participating in a club race

Week 4 of no mold in bidons

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How was your ride today berts? Outside for once for me, testing the new gravel machine on the tarmac. Felt very nice to ride, 6 degrees and small drizzle with very little wind. Just very gloomy and dark when I came back.

 >>/55062/
The massive headwind flag at the end always crack me up

 >>/55068/
it's a r*nning day since the sun is out again

> all the zoom meeting cancel one after the other
Could have gone riding if these people told it before

 >>/55071/
you should know better than expecting academics to work betwixt the festive period, best try again January 5

 >>/55071/
Should have know better that expecting academics to work

 >>/55060/
go onto 4chan and you'll see it's not a theory, bot thread after bot thread
and boards that don't get botted have the same threads from 6 months ago

ate too much salami and cheese again

 >>/55075/
What do you mean too much. Are you CRAZY

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 >>/55041/
what's the difference between this one and the spcycle frame

 >>/55076/
the european mind is incapable of comprehending the quantity of charcuterie I have just consumed

 >>/55077/
I think the Spcycle one is almost identical to the fm326, so slacker geometry compared to my 316. No flip chip either in the fork, and some minor differences elsewhere - I think there's a chinertown thread on it.

 >>/55079/
what did you end up paying for yours, since they don't show price on their website but spcycle does

 >>/55041/
why didn't you bought Finnbert's frame instead of that slop?

 >>/55081/
that is finnbert

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 >>/55081/
finnbert buying his own frame from himself as he's replacing it with another frame would be peak payoink because you get both the dopamine from buying and selling

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I have to say I don't like that seatstay window but I fear it'll become common place among many frames because it probably gives +1.2w in a wind tunnel test and everyone's gotta optimize for that

 >>/55082/
 >>/55083/
it's fr*nch flag Though

 >>/55072/
 >>/55073/
First they're all asian but almost work like mad men

 >>/55085/
sometimes he's spanish, sometimes he's belgian, sometimes he's french, sometimes he's american
maybe he's got other flags in his repertoire who knows, could be anyone in this thread

I've decided that carbon is the superior material and so I will give away my steel frame for free as Bert's secret santa gift

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 >>/55088/
mhmm

 >>/55083/
if anyone is to rival Brtek for paypig of the year then it's probably our Bërtt

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 >>/55088/

 >>/55090/
Finnbert is the god of paypigerie, dude buys 3 frame per year

 >>/55092/
but somehow all of his frames are also smart budget picks and he sells a lot
I know a fredgod with like 3 13k bikes and that makes me appreciate finnbert a lot

 >>/55090/
I'm on the podium as well, easily. And several purchases have been on the > not all too smart side sadly

 >>/55094/
What's your worst purchase of the year?

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Wout bros...

it's not the quantity of the p*rchases so much as the piggery of the p*yments

 >>/55096/
oh no no no no

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Turns out the torque wrench i paypig'd is not a torque wrench at  all, it just has an "upper limit" of 18 NM.
I guess I will give it to one of me mates as christmas present than

 >>/55093/
I guess it comes from our family being quite poor when I was a child, learnt the value of money from my parents and grandparents. Now as an adult I have more money than I can ever spend, and yet I get a psychological block when I buy something really expensive if I can't justify it being better than a lower priced version. So I end up buying Chinesium frames for peanuts instead of Sir Velo and S Works.

 >>/55100/
A bit the same. As long as you enjoy ciclismo it doesn't really matter if your bike is 7 or 9 kg

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 >>/55095/
garmin of course no contest there
switching bike was also a bad decision because I wanted to fix a fit issue but I miscalculated so it didn't work well

 >>/55102/
1040?

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The margins must be bigger than Apple

 >>/55103/
540 and the unit was faulty and had bugs and crashes

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 >>/55103/

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I wonder if some bert ever tried one of these? Honestly it's not like garmin does anything incredible

 >>/55104/
I unironically think it takes like 30 bucks to produce something like this

 >>/55108/
yes but think of the countless trillions in R&D

 >>/55109/
true, all the useless bloat they add needs to be financed
line must go up

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> DNF GOYGOY Tinkle

And my boy Marella SAI NARSIMHA ISHANT SHARMA got DSQ
Grim news coming from Sampalpur

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lots of DSQ at the Indian MJ ITT

 >>/55114/
Good riddance

 >>/55114/
hunnid quid for unlicensed audio equipment usage in public are they daft

 >>/55116/
with a 50% discount or whatever that means, it actually says 200 on the left

 >>/55117/
50% off if you're a repeat offender maybe

all the Giro profiles are up, kind of a funky one; only three straightforward sprint stages, but the hilly stuff isn't all that crazy outside of the couple big mountain days

 >>/55114/
What about respecting the law?

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 >>/55120/
never

> listening to anything except you're own grunts and groans
or squeaking and creaking in the case of certain berts of this very general

 >>/55122/
It's the zoomer life. Soon they'll have TikTok on their Garmin

 >>/55122/
how else will we all listen to froomedawgs playlist on our Z2 spins

 >>/55124/
> working in an even numbered zone
ISHYBDDT

 >>/55125/
you can do z1 off the back of the group if you want

 >>/55126/
as for me it will be Z3 with my boys tête and cabeza

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La Vuelta Ciclista Internacional a Costa Rica FEVER

 >>/55129/
knew you'd come down with a sickness after your piver binging

 >>/55129/
waar is Bart Buijk?

 >>/55131/
Just finished Ghana, which is one big race in his calendar. Might take a few weeks off

 >>/55132/
Mhmm finishing off ganna

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LFG

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Realistically, how much more would I need to finish a decent build? 1.5k?

 >>/55136/
Do you have good wheels? Groupsets aren't cheap anymore. None of them are

 >>/55136/
Bring it to my shop and I will build it for you

 >>/55137/
Yeah that's my worry. I would be fine with mech 105 but my mechanical grx is so shit I'll never buy mec shimano again

 >>/55136/
somewhere in the realm of 2000€ if you buy a sram or shimano electronic group and everything carbon and otherwise from china at the cheapest but good level 
like 3500-4000€ if you buy only western brands

 >>/55136/
I can sell you my Sram Force D1 brakes & cables & paceline disc (160mm + 140mm), Red D1 crank with Red 48/35 chainring (165mm), Force 10-33 cassette, Force chain, Force E1 rear and front derailleur, 9velo carbon wheels and GP5000 tyres for 1800e.

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Arne MARIT to Red Bull BORA hansgrohe

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> BIANCHI to CANYON/SRAM

GIRMAY Biniam to NSN Cycling Team (this is old news)